When I reverse my car, if my wife or children are in the car, I look at them and say “ahhh this takes me back” every single time. It’s my most long-running and groaned about dad joke.
Extra points if my sons girlfriend is in the car as I get a ” dad you’re so embarrassing” to accompany the eyeroll.
In terms of terrible running gags that I never get tired of saying? Whenever my daughter bonks into something, I’ll say “Don’t hurt yourself, that hurts.”
In terms of actual terrible puns, my wife is a daywalker and lasts about half an hour out in the sun before she starts burning. She was doing yard work, lost track of time, and got horrifically sunburned. I told her “I still find you appealing”
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I used to tell dad jokes until he passed away.
When I reverse my car, if my wife or children are in the car, I look at them and say “ahhh this takes me back” every single time. It’s my most long-running and groaned about dad joke.
Extra points if my sons girlfriend is in the car as I get a ” dad you’re so embarrassing” to accompany the eyeroll.
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don’t know y
I don’t have a favorite but some ones I found funny are:
I support farming, infact you could call me protractor.
If you’re driving a Tesla and it has been stolen, is it now an Edison?
What do tofu and an adult toy have in common? They’re both meat substitutes.
The alphabet is terrifying, a bee sea? No thanks, we’re good.
Where do bad rainbows go? To prism. It’s a light sentence but it gives them time to reflect.
I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
In terms of terrible running gags that I never get tired of saying? Whenever my daughter bonks into something, I’ll say “Don’t hurt yourself, that hurts.”
In terms of actual terrible puns, my wife is a daywalker and lasts about half an hour out in the sun before she starts burning. She was doing yard work, lost track of time, and got horrifically sunburned. I told her “I still find you appealing”
FAQ
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
What do you call a pig with six eyes?
PIIIIIIG
What’s brown and rhymes with snoop?
Dr. Dre
I got a new one that can write underwater.
It can write a bunch of other words too.
What do you call a hippies wife?
Mississippi
What’s green and has 47 wheels?
Grass. I lied about the wheels.