He had values, personal passions/hobbies and somewhat of a plan where he wanted to be. He also wasn’t looking for a replacement of his mother. Like he actually was a grown up man.
When I had a migraine, and the light was hurting my eyes too much to read, he got me a sleep mask and some medicine, and read a chapter of my book aloud to me until I felt better. I knew then.
Everything was easy because communication was great and there was no judgement whatsoever, only acceptance. I’ve always felt safe emotionally and trust was total from the start. There’s absolutely no doubt in my mind that we’re gonna grow old together.
I’m reminded daily by his behavior and how he takes me into consideration. I’m a T1 diabetic and my husband knows everything he can about the disease and about my patterns. Today, before we set off to walk to the city center, he asked me if he should bring his backpack with my emergency sugar and soda just in case. Another example is how he makes me lavender tea every night as I get ready for bed. He puts it on my nightstand then he finds our favorite sound bath YouTube video and puts it on for me because he knows I can’t sleep without it.
It’s really the small things that are the key to knowing if you have found your person.
He has never made me feel like I am less. He has healthy relationships with his friends and some family, he doesn’t jump to conclusions,respects my boundaries, treats me like a human instead of a prize to be won and thinks my jokes are funny.
My grandfather (who raised me) died. He showed up and then some, like he was there for me in ways and to an extent I hadn’t even thought of much less expected. We had already been together a long time and I already thought I knew he was the one, but it really drove it home beyond doubt. I called him a couple weeks after the funeral and asked if he wanted to skip the big wedding and just go get married at the court house. He said absolutely yes and we’ve been married 9 years so far, have a daughter together and are still going strong!
We genuinely made a great team and were happy to work together.
My husband and I met when I was 18 and he was 20 and we were both in college. So we experienced a lot of our “firsts” of adulthood together. Not only did we really help and support each other, but we had a great time. First time we had his apartment on campus to ourselves was over winter break, and we did our grocery shopping together, errands before the new semester, even went on a nice date, and it was awesome. We even stuck together through the pandemic a year later despite being long distance and came up with ways to keep each other going. And when we moved in together in grad-school, it just felt right. It felt like coming home. We could balance chores based who was good at what and we enjoyed even just eating dinner on the couch while watching the evening news. Yes there’s passion and romance, and we also function like a perfect team!
He rubbed my feet after a week of super grueling dance rehearsals and even looked up special techniques online beforehand. He always took care of me first and I knew he’d be a great husband and father. I was right. We’ve been together 8 years and we have 2 small children. I’m more in love with him now than i was before we became parents.
He also asked me to move in with him after a few months of dating and I felt no doubts about it.
I could talk with him about what I liked without feeling stupid. I could listen to him go on about his hobbies for hours without getting bored. If I told him no, he respected my boundaries. He cared about my comfort and happiness. He defended me, even against his parents. He told me he was bullied as a kid and I immediately started plotting revenge on everyone who had ever wronged him.
I said we could wait to get married and instead spend our money travelling, but then thought about it and realised I had been ready to be his wife the day we met so I told him I’d changed my mind and we got hitched sixteen years ago in September.
It was the end of my first date (!!) with a man I’d had a strong platonic friendship with for a long time. We had already shared a lot of our past trauma with each other through a support group for young adults who had lost parents early.
Our first official date went phenomenonally well, so I decided I wanted to rip the bandaid off. Seems like a bad idea in retrospect, but I ended up dumping the rest of my trauma on him. I think I wanted him to know everything, so that if my history was too much for him we could end it right away.
But the dam burst. I don’t know how long I cried into his chest, but I ended up physically exhausted and I couldn’t cry anymore. Then I fell asleep on him on my living room sofa.
When I woke up the next morning I was in bed – he had carried me there, taken my shoes off and put a blanket on me. Otherwise I was still dressed in my date clothes so I know he didn’t take advantage.
I came out from my bedroom into the kitchen and he was making breakfast for me.
I was lucky enough to find my soulmate in my best friend so I just knew it was logical to marry the person I want to be there with me for the rest of my life.
Apologized when he did something wrong and actually changed his behavior afterwards. Growing up in a toxic household, this was something extremely eye opening and I saw it as a a green flag.
He’s my best friend and lover, all in one. That’s enough right there, but what really lets me know, is that I wake up every day, and want to do life with him. Icing on the cake is I fall more in love with him as time goes on. He’s my person. Marriage might not be for us (both had terrible divorces) but I know he’s my forever.
I never thought of any of our problems as fights. They were problems and we worked on overcoming them together
I never felt like I was anywhere other than by his side.
Comments
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He had a plan. A clear plan.
He had values, personal passions/hobbies and somewhat of a plan where he wanted to be. He also wasn’t looking for a replacement of his mother. Like he actually was a grown up man.
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When he told me he thought he was in love with me 2 months in and I wasn’t scared
I didn’t care about who else might be out there and knew nothing was missing from the relationship.
When I had a migraine, and the light was hurting my eyes too much to read, he got me a sleep mask and some medicine, and read a chapter of my book aloud to me until I felt better. I knew then.
[removed]
I didn’t have to hide anything about myself w him. He could see ALL of me, the good, the bad, everything, and still choose to love me and be with me.
Best looks, brains, sex and character. That’s all there was too it. Probably no coincidence she’s asian.
Everything was easy because communication was great and there was no judgement whatsoever, only acceptance. I’ve always felt safe emotionally and trust was total from the start. There’s absolutely no doubt in my mind that we’re gonna grow old together.
Early on when I realized I didn’t want to do this life without him.
When 4 years felt like 6 months. Easy.
I’m reminded daily by his behavior and how he takes me into consideration. I’m a T1 diabetic and my husband knows everything he can about the disease and about my patterns. Today, before we set off to walk to the city center, he asked me if he should bring his backpack with my emergency sugar and soda just in case. Another example is how he makes me lavender tea every night as I get ready for bed. He puts it on my nightstand then he finds our favorite sound bath YouTube video and puts it on for me because he knows I can’t sleep without it.
It’s really the small things that are the key to knowing if you have found your person.
[removed]
He has never made me feel like I am less. He has healthy relationships with his friends and some family, he doesn’t jump to conclusions,respects my boundaries, treats me like a human instead of a prize to be won and thinks my jokes are funny.
My grandfather (who raised me) died. He showed up and then some, like he was there for me in ways and to an extent I hadn’t even thought of much less expected. We had already been together a long time and I already thought I knew he was the one, but it really drove it home beyond doubt. I called him a couple weeks after the funeral and asked if he wanted to skip the big wedding and just go get married at the court house. He said absolutely yes and we’ve been married 9 years so far, have a daughter together and are still going strong!
We genuinely made a great team and were happy to work together.
My husband and I met when I was 18 and he was 20 and we were both in college. So we experienced a lot of our “firsts” of adulthood together. Not only did we really help and support each other, but we had a great time. First time we had his apartment on campus to ourselves was over winter break, and we did our grocery shopping together, errands before the new semester, even went on a nice date, and it was awesome. We even stuck together through the pandemic a year later despite being long distance and came up with ways to keep each other going. And when we moved in together in grad-school, it just felt right. It felt like coming home. We could balance chores based who was good at what and we enjoyed even just eating dinner on the couch while watching the evening news. Yes there’s passion and romance, and we also function like a perfect team!
He rubbed my feet after a week of super grueling dance rehearsals and even looked up special techniques online beforehand. He always took care of me first and I knew he’d be a great husband and father. I was right. We’ve been together 8 years and we have 2 small children. I’m more in love with him now than i was before we became parents.
He also asked me to move in with him after a few months of dating and I felt no doubts about it.
I could talk with him about what I liked without feeling stupid. I could listen to him go on about his hobbies for hours without getting bored. If I told him no, he respected my boundaries. He cared about my comfort and happiness. He defended me, even against his parents. He told me he was bullied as a kid and I immediately started plotting revenge on everyone who had ever wronged him.
I said we could wait to get married and instead spend our money travelling, but then thought about it and realised I had been ready to be his wife the day we met so I told him I’d changed my mind and we got hitched sixteen years ago in September.
It was the end of my first date (!!) with a man I’d had a strong platonic friendship with for a long time. We had already shared a lot of our past trauma with each other through a support group for young adults who had lost parents early.
Our first official date went phenomenonally well, so I decided I wanted to rip the bandaid off. Seems like a bad idea in retrospect, but I ended up dumping the rest of my trauma on him. I think I wanted him to know everything, so that if my history was too much for him we could end it right away.
But the dam burst. I don’t know how long I cried into his chest, but I ended up physically exhausted and I couldn’t cry anymore. Then I fell asleep on him on my living room sofa.
When I woke up the next morning I was in bed – he had carried me there, taken my shoes off and put a blanket on me. Otherwise I was still dressed in my date clothes so I know he didn’t take advantage.
I came out from my bedroom into the kitchen and he was making breakfast for me.
That’s when I knew.
I was lucky enough to find my soulmate in my best friend so I just knew it was logical to marry the person I want to be there with me for the rest of my life.
He was there during my worst times and was so kind – kinder than anyone else in my life. He wanted to be there to take care of me
Apologized when he did something wrong and actually changed his behavior afterwards. Growing up in a toxic household, this was something extremely eye opening and I saw it as a a green flag.
He’s my best friend and lover, all in one. That’s enough right there, but what really lets me know, is that I wake up every day, and want to do life with him. Icing on the cake is I fall more in love with him as time goes on. He’s my person. Marriage might not be for us (both had terrible divorces) but I know he’s my forever.
I never thought of any of our problems as fights. They were problems and we worked on overcoming them together
I never felt like I was anywhere other than by his side.