When someone constantly reminds you how many degrees they have, but tries to play it down by complaining how they’ll never get their money’s worth out of them and aren’t using them.
Telling you their life story, within minutes of meeting is always a big red flag to me. Yes we all have trauma, myself included, and it’s good to talk, however not if I’m.a stranger to you.
Every single time you speak, or begin your story, joke or anecdote, only to be interrupted, and talked over by someone so they can talk/humblebrag about themselves.
We’ve all met someone like that in our lives. They’re totally incapable of listening, or holding a two-way conversation. They never ask anyone else a follow up question or show any interest in anyone else.
Unpopular opinion but I think it’s weird when you meet someone and they add you on instagram and all of their posts are just selfies of them. No hate, it’s just strange
I have a friend that even in group photos he manages to stand out and do model poses. And his jokes/most of the things he says are “yeah I’m awesome” “yeah I’m perfect” + model face
Idk if he’s a narcissist but he is a little obsessed with himself
When people are uninterested in the conversation, then I mention a valuable skill I have and their ears perk up. Only interested in talking to me if I can do something for them.
They feel more like a black hole than a person. Doesn’t really matter how much you “pour in”. It’s never enough.
If I catch myself feeling like I’m walking on eggshells or tip-toeing around someone almost all the time in order to avoid an interaction feeling “ruined”…it’s usually a good sign I should put some distance in.
One upping all the time, rude to wait staff (there are exceptions to this), always talking about themselves, embellishing their accomplishments, all the “buddies” they supposedly have.
Constantly telling stories especially about other people. Even if they arent necessarily negative stories. A constant need for attention is a big indicator
Someone shares a cool thing they did – and the narc cuts the reaction short, and one-up them.
God forbid anyone else have the “spotlight” for longer than 60 seconds.
^ This is a classic thing that happens in my house all the time that my father does. No one has any achievements or celebrations that last longer than 30 seconds, because he will immediately cut-in with some “new” great thing HE DID, or he will outright say something insulting to knock you down a peg. Pay attention to how long they allow someone to celebrate good news, and if they are open, congratulatory, and curious to know more.
I once got a job after searching 8 months for one, and his first words were “about time” and laughed at me.
They take offense when you do or say, or even enjoy something they don’t like. I’m talking specifically about a narcissistic parent. You must live your life in the way THEY envision for you, and if you don’t, you are punished, belittled, and ignored.
When I first meet someone, I watch their eyes. Narcissists tend not to look you in the eyes. They’re too bored to focus on you. Their eyes flit around the room or wherever they are, or stare at something else. Not saying everyone who does this is a narc, but it’s a clue.
Demanding rather than asking and then being appalled and engaged when the person they’re demanding something from doesn’t cave. It’s wild that full grown adults will expect everything to be catered to them and that they did no wrong.
To answer your question properly, as someone who struggles with narcissistic traits, I can practically smell people with Cluster B personality disorders. They’re always either a bit too loud for the social situation, or a bit too quiet, so you want to ask them questions. Everything exists in relation to them, instead of that person being just one person in the world. When you see it, it can’t be unseen.
I deal with my narcissist tendencies by bragging about stupid shit, if it comes up. Like, if someone says they’re a chess grandmaster, “I’m wayyy, better at chess, and arm wrestling, so let’s arm wrestle.” I don’t do this every day, or every time a situation comes up where I could be a selfish menace, but it sates the appetite without offending… Usually.
Some people are just naturally dull and can’t tell I’m joking. Works for me. I just snapped out of a narcissistic hellhole and you can keep being you.
Just reread everything I typed and realized it sounded incredibly narcissistic. Uh. Go Rockets I guess.
Fake empathy and scripted questions so they can talk about what they want. You may not pick up on it the first time but you’ll notice the empathy every time being the same exact practiced facial expression, and the questions being not from the convo at hand.
Lazy. Take credit for other people‘s work. Can’t take criticism. Constantly lie, or bend the truth to make themselves look better. Talk about how great they are when they actually suck and use the people around them to make themselves look good.
They always have to be right, they always have to have the last word, they always play the victim, they always interrupt when they don’t like what they are hearing.
Comments
When they always find a way to make the conversation about themself
Not being able to take the slightest form of criticism
backhanded compliments
Every subject you discuss ends up in a story about them…
Like this one time I…… Oh…. Bugger
A woman walked in a restaurant the other day and she was supposed to order from the kioski.
Instead, she shouted to the employees to make her food and they did it.
They think highly of themselves and they act like they world revolves around them.
They hijack every conversation to brag about themselves, even when you’re just talking about your dog.
When someone constantly reminds you how many degrees they have, but tries to play it down by complaining how they’ll never get their money’s worth out of them and aren’t using them.
me..i often scream it when i interact with people
They take everything as a personal attack
When they can’t think past their own self. Inability to empathize.
Talking excessively loud in public, such that other people turn their heads to see who is disturbing the peace.
When they never take accountability for what they’ve done and blame you instead
Never ask anyone a single question, just endless monologue
Telling you their life story, within minutes of meeting is always a big red flag to me. Yes we all have trauma, myself included, and it’s good to talk, however not if I’m.a stranger to you.
Every single time you speak, or begin your story, joke or anecdote, only to be interrupted, and talked over by someone so they can talk/humblebrag about themselves.
We’ve all met someone like that in our lives. They’re totally incapable of listening, or holding a two-way conversation. They never ask anyone else a follow up question or show any interest in anyone else.
Taking every response as an argument
When they want to one-up everyone during conversation.
Whenever they talk they’re either inflating their self image/building themselves up or putting another person down/making fun of them (can be subtle)
Someone who vents everything about their life but cannot provide the smallest ounce of support
Gaslighting
Mock disabled people, jews, gays, blacks etc etc
Every conversation they win. They set up the game you can’t win ever.
They are always the good guy in the story.
Unpopular opinion but I think it’s weird when you meet someone and they add you on instagram and all of their posts are just selfies of them. No hate, it’s just strange
they are very hard to spot, usually quite charming though
Look at my family tree……
I have a friend that even in group photos he manages to stand out and do model poses. And his jokes/most of the things he says are “yeah I’m awesome” “yeah I’m perfect” + model face
Idk if he’s a narcissist but he is a little obsessed with himself
When you call them out for something and they immediately say that you do that thing. No growth.
When they turn every conversation back to them
Orange paint.
Can’t take criticism, gaslights you, “rules for thee but not for me” philosophy.
When people are uninterested in the conversation, then I mention a valuable skill I have and their ears perk up. Only interested in talking to me if I can do something for them.
A certain desperation to lock in plans, contracts, and collaborations – marriage even
“Enough about me, what about you, what do you think of me?”
They are ONLY impressed by things that remind them of themselves.
And if they say you remind them of themselves, they see that as the ultimate compliment.
::shudders as a few people come to mind::
They feel more like a black hole than a person. Doesn’t really matter how much you “pour in”. It’s never enough.
If I catch myself feeling like I’m walking on eggshells or tip-toeing around someone almost all the time in order to avoid an interaction feeling “ruined”…it’s usually a good sign I should put some distance in.
Inability to take accountability or apologize for actions or behavior
Yall throw this word around too much
Their face lights up when you mention some formative childhood difficulty. They love when you have a weakness they can exploit.
Not accepting responsibility…
Lack empathy and be extremely gleeful at others’ misfortune 🙄
Always making themselves out to be a victim and how they’re downtrodden in the world
Being incapable of giving a sincere apology even when you are obviously in the wrong!
Everything is always amazing and perfect, even when it’s not. They just have to one up you constantly
Takes zero accountability for their shitty behavior and is always playing the victim in every negative situation.
Play victim
One upping all the time, rude to wait staff (there are exceptions to this), always talking about themselves, embellishing their accomplishments, all the “buddies” they supposedly have.
They check their social media posts constantly.
Very sociable, and quite likable upon first meeting, but they don’t have any close friends or most friends don’t last too long.
When having a conversation, someone is obvious just waiting for their turn to talk.
Never shutting tf up
You can’t joke around with these people, having fun and goofing off at their expense or having fun without them is like their highway to hell.
That one time a guy asked me for spare change outside the gas station and I said “I’m a narcissist!”
Constantly telling stories especially about other people. Even if they arent necessarily negative stories. A constant need for attention is a big indicator
Someone shares a cool thing they did – and the narc cuts the reaction short, and one-up them.
God forbid anyone else have the “spotlight” for longer than 60 seconds.
^ This is a classic thing that happens in my house all the time that my father does. No one has any achievements or celebrations that last longer than 30 seconds, because he will immediately cut-in with some “new” great thing HE DID, or he will outright say something insulting to knock you down a peg. Pay attention to how long they allow someone to celebrate good news, and if they are open, congratulatory, and curious to know more.
I once got a job after searching 8 months for one, and his first words were “about time” and laughed at me.
Being self serving. Using others for gain. A lot of these comments are describing ego not narcissism
They take offense when you do or say, or even enjoy something they don’t like. I’m talking specifically about a narcissistic parent. You must live your life in the way THEY envision for you, and if you don’t, you are punished, belittled, and ignored.
saying someone has a problem with them “for no reason” or being like “I still don’t know why” someone doesn’t like them
That they “just don’t understand” (it’s always those three words) why their adult children don’t talk to them.
People who can’t apologize or admit they messed up.
They don’t like it when you use the word narcissist or narcissism.
Steering the conversation back to themselves when others bring up new topics
When I first meet someone, I watch their eyes. Narcissists tend not to look you in the eyes. They’re too bored to focus on you. Their eyes flit around the room or wherever they are, or stare at something else. Not saying everyone who does this is a narc, but it’s a clue.
Insults veiled as jokes
Narcissistic people are almost always very charming in public. So it’s not easy to spot unless you live with one.
They have rules for you but not for themselves
Trauma dump right after you say hello
They are never in the wrong
Demanding rather than asking and then being appalled and engaged when the person they’re demanding something from doesn’t cave. It’s wild that full grown adults will expect everything to be catered to them and that they did no wrong.
Blaming everyone but themselves for their problems and blatantly + constantly lying even when you know the truth.
i wouldn’t know coz im not out there trying to be wantonly judgy and villainize everyone i run into 🤷
YOU ALL CLEARLY HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT A NARCISSIST IS
To answer your question properly, as someone who struggles with narcissistic traits, I can practically smell people with Cluster B personality disorders. They’re always either a bit too loud for the social situation, or a bit too quiet, so you want to ask them questions. Everything exists in relation to them, instead of that person being just one person in the world. When you see it, it can’t be unseen.
I deal with my narcissist tendencies by bragging about stupid shit, if it comes up. Like, if someone says they’re a chess grandmaster, “I’m wayyy, better at chess, and arm wrestling, so let’s arm wrestle.” I don’t do this every day, or every time a situation comes up where I could be a selfish menace, but it sates the appetite without offending… Usually.
Some people are just naturally dull and can’t tell I’m joking. Works for me. I just snapped out of a narcissistic hellhole and you can keep being you.
Just reread everything I typed and realized it sounded incredibly narcissistic. Uh. Go Rockets I guess.
Pathologically self-absorbed, condescending, doesn’t consider other people’s feelings.
When they could actually care less about you and “toss” you away so easily without a care in the world.
They have to be louder and almost immediately have to state how intelligent they are. Their body language is huge tell, too.
When you feel exhausted after you’ve interacted with them. Soul suckers.
Constantly talking about how narcissistic other people are.
They are the victim in every story they tell.
Fake empathy and scripted questions so they can talk about what they want. You may not pick up on it the first time but you’ll notice the empathy every time being the same exact practiced facial expression, and the questions being not from the convo at hand.
What kind of narcissist? There is more than one kind, some you will never be able to tell until it’s too late.
Their preference to tell you who they are rather than show
An individual who proudly admits they voted for the current White House occupant.
Lazy. Take credit for other people‘s work. Can’t take criticism. Constantly lie, or bend the truth to make themselves look better. Talk about how great they are when they actually suck and use the people around them to make themselves look good.
They always have to be right, they always have to have the last word, they always play the victim, they always interrupt when they don’t like what they are hearing.