I (25f) has been together with my bf( 24m) for about 3 years now. We were together for about 6 months in the start and then had to be in LDR. Despite that things had been great…it was fun, romantic, had deep conversations and everything. Fast forwarding to the end of second year….he changed…his texts got shorter….late replies. And whenever I use talk about it or get upset he would dismiss it sometimes, other times he would say sorry coldly and repeat the same thing. With time he visibly started to get annoyed with me …..I gave him space further……even from the start we have been very mindful of each other’s personal space and time. Then thrice he blocked me out of the blue and left and then came back with months of the gap in between. He says he wanna be better but as the same time he says he dislikes me. I was open to change and ask what’s the issue..to which he had no answer. He doesn’t ever communicate properly. I do love him wholeheartedly….but he has been tearing me up mentally and emotionally for last 6 months now. What should I do???
IM SORRY IT’S POORLY WRITTEN…I am crying as I type this.
TL; DR I( 25f) is being pushed and pull by the bf (24m) for months…I love him …he doesn’t communicate…can this relationship be repaired or I’m just prolonging my misery?
Comments
Am I reading this correctly that he would block you for months at a time, then reach out saying he wanted to make things work but didn’t really like you, and you in fact got back together?
That’s not love. That’s awful. It’s really sad that you think so little of yourself that you think the best you can do is some guy that doesn’t even like you. Being alone is much much better than that.
Please do yourself a favour and block him and never unblock him again.
If you have space to heal, focus on your own personal growth, and make some friends that truly support you, you will think so much better of yourself and it will be very easy to find someone better than this loser, if that’s what you decide you want.
There’s someone else
According to research by the Gottman Love Lab, in a stable relationship, you should have 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction. Any less than that, and there is a 90% chance that you’ll break up.
Your boyfriend doesn’t seem to enjoy your company. He avoids you, blocks you without explanation, and tells you to your face that he dislikes you. I’m sure you love him – there must be something about him that appeals to you for you to put up with this for so long – but you can’t love him enough for both of you. Relationships take effort from both sides.
If you break up with him, it will hurt for a while, but it will be better for you in the long term. Staying in a romantic relationship with someone who doesn’t like you will eventually destroy your self-esteem. You are already begging him to tell you what’s wrong with you so you can change for him. Why should you change? He’s the problem.
He’s cheating. Even if he wasn’t, he clearly doesn’t like you. He even TOLD you he doesn’t like you. Have some self respect, leave him and be happy
Why do you keep taking him back after he ghosts you for months?