It finally hit when my mum who was the one person I thought I could trust started putting me down because she now has a few family members in our country. She puts me down and side with her nieces.
I had depression (while living alone and working from home during covid lockdown, so I was already very isolated). I knew I needed a therapist, but when I contacted one, she told me that I couldn’t have therapy unless I listed an emergency contact on my paperwork. I asked one of my closest friends, and he said yes and that he felt honored to be asked — and then after I submitted the paperwork, when I was so close to finally starting therapy after years of depression, he told me he changed his mind because he thought his partner would be uncomfortable with it. Then I asked my other closest friend, and she didn’t respond. I had to google “can you hire someone to be your emergency contact” while sobbing.
The worst part was that my depression was caused in large part by loneliness. So, in effect, the therapist told me that she couldn’t treat my depression unless I fixed the thing that was causing my depression in the first place.
I think about that every time someone says, “You don’t need a partner, just have friends instead!” or “A partner is not a substitute for a therapist.” Being single literally made it harder for me to access therapy.
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It finally hit when my mum who was the one person I thought I could trust started putting me down because she now has a few family members in our country. She puts me down and side with her nieces.
When my mom died.
When my mother told me to stfu and not tell anyone when I told her my uncle, her brother, molested me as a child.
Kinda always knew unfortunately
I had depression (while living alone and working from home during covid lockdown, so I was already very isolated). I knew I needed a therapist, but when I contacted one, she told me that I couldn’t have therapy unless I listed an emergency contact on my paperwork. I asked one of my closest friends, and he said yes and that he felt honored to be asked — and then after I submitted the paperwork, when I was so close to finally starting therapy after years of depression, he told me he changed his mind because he thought his partner would be uncomfortable with it. Then I asked my other closest friend, and she didn’t respond. I had to google “can you hire someone to be your emergency contact” while sobbing.
The worst part was that my depression was caused in large part by loneliness. So, in effect, the therapist told me that she couldn’t treat my depression unless I fixed the thing that was causing my depression in the first place.
I think about that every time someone says, “You don’t need a partner, just have friends instead!” or “A partner is not a substitute for a therapist.” Being single literally made it harder for me to access therapy.
Sobbing at 2 am holding my newborn who I couldn’t soothe. No one was coming to hold her or give me a break.