Doesn’t have to be in relationships, but my example is that when I was sitting with my new partner in silence and when I asked her if everything’s okay due to my brain thinking silence=bad, but learning that if it’s someone you can love and trust, it’s nothing to worry about!
What was the moment you realized you’ve moved on to better, healthier things?
r/AskMen
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Every time when I’m too busy with real life to go on the internet
I looked at an old photo of me in a toxic situation and felt nothing but compassion for past me.
Not anger. Not shame. Just love and a little sadness that I stayed so long.
Therapy helped me realize I had impulse control issues when it came to porn, strip clubs, etc.
Realized I have issues with budgeting/impulse control and have slowly made better decisions in my early 30s
when i had asked my man if he cheated on me, i just felt like he did, and he said no i would never. and in that moment i fr knew he wouldn’t ever, we been together almost 2 years. last guy that said that cheated a week later, came home covered in hickeys after “work” i knew he would fr, yk? but with this one, the calmness in his voice, his touch, it all tells me i’m with a good one this time. we can argue and he will not yell at me, or even raise his voice. we talk everything out, he helps me and i help him with everything. this is my man fr. this is the one im gonna marry. he got me away from my abusive/toxic household, moved me in with him not even a year of being together, has been nothing but happiness with him, he supports my dreams, even tho im in college and changed what i was going for, he’s in it for the long run, i have a promise ring and i cannot wait to get the real wife ring. i will forever cook, clean, and take care of this man and all his babies i will have for him, i have miscarried one of his babies tho, and he stood beside me every doctor visit, every time i cried over it, and he still does. these past 2 years with him, have been the absolute best, i love it and wouldn’t change it for the world, i love him so much. -🤍
When I served a 45 month sentence and was released. I realized that 45 months was a breeze compared to the 20+ years of hell with my ex. Now I am truly FREE
The only one that sticks out is the first time I did 100 miles in a single bike ride.
That was a huge goal for me when I decided enough was enough and it was time to drop 75lbs (which I did and have kept dropped for over a decade).
I set myself two goals, a 200KM (124 miles) bike ride for charity and getting back to the weight I was in my 20’s (185 on a 6’1 frame – which is about where I look/felt the best) inside a year, I did it with 3 months to spare on the weight loss and 5mths for the charity ride – in terms of earth shattering changes not a big one but in terms of reasserting control over my life a huge one.
The upshot was I basically quit drinking in the process, learnt to cook healthier food, discovered I actually enjoy cycling – all in all a positive experience, it’s hard to be stressed/angry on a bike.
My therapist told my wife and I we didn’t need to come back.
I used to have a friend, a longtime friend. We were really close. We started smoking weed casually, but then it became more frequent over time.
Well, he kinda found himself a new group of friends… and his annoying girlfriend, meh. So we don’t really talk anymore. But honestly, I’m glad I’m not smoking anymore. it’s a really bad habit
When I noticed I didn’t have this air of weight around me at all times. I was able to enjoy things I liked more, I was able to establish boundaries and not feel bad, I was able to look at situations differently and neutrally. The biggest thing, though, was noticing how different my mental thoughts were. I was just having much more positive thoughts than I was before and my outlook on life felt a lot brighter.