what’s some advice you would tell your 20 year old self?

r/

just as the title says. i’m in my 20s and would want to hear on other’s answers to this question. if you have any, feel free to respond.

Comments

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  2. PsychologicalShop292 Avatar

    Don’t neglect your health and don’t let people use you.

  3. Schadenfreudetastic Avatar

    Consider staying in the military. She’s not the the one you’ll marry and the next one will get you to the brink of offing yourself.

  4. gallo-s-chingon Avatar
    • my value as a man doesn’t correlate with having been with more women than most men
    • myword/bond can only increase in value over years, and it take just one lie to ruin decades worth of work
    • i need to learn to be happy on my own to be able to be truly happy in a relationship by adding to each others happiness (not relying on each other to make oneself happy)
    • a good woman is better than 100 hot women
    • STFU, listen and learn. you don’t know shit, and until you’re THE world’s leading expert, keep learning
    • just because you can’t agree on something doesn’t mean there isn’t common ground
    • when you stop being open to new ideas/perspectives you start to grow old
    • exercise everyday, your life depends on it
    • you don’t need to clean your plate
    • eat dessert first
    • hot women ≠ good sex
  5. Appropriate_Copy8285 Avatar

    Wear ear protection and sunscreen…..dokt worry about being considered a “pussy”.

  6. xenocea Avatar
    • Don’t let what others think or say, dictate you as a person
    • Friends are not forever. People come and go in life
    • Don’t take anything for granted. Cherish the time you have with families
    • The right woman, will eventually come
    • Time heals everything
    • You can not please everyone
    • Prioritize your health and wellbeing
    • Don’t trust people too easily and let them take advantage of you
  7. TheUnderCrab Avatar

    Open a RothIRA account. Even if you can only out $50/mo into it, the compounding growth means starting early gives you a huge benefit later. Time in the market beats timing the market. 

    Wear more sunscreen. It’s the easiest thing you can do to prevent cancer later in life. 

  8. allislost77 Avatar

    Time literally flies. So find a balance of enjoying it while working your ass off towards your future. It’s ok not knowing what you “want” to do, but chose something that is paying you well and a skill you can fall back on. Skip the Disney idea that you need to find a partner/girlfriend/wife and fall in “love”, you’re too young and your time is better spent building your life and what you’d want it to look like, it’ll be here before you know it.

    Most importantly, all you have is today. So don’t be a dick. Treat people how you would like to be treated, if you don’t have anything nice to say: shut the fuck up. Tell your mom you love her and try to improve everyday.

  9. Mammoth_Elk_3807 Avatar

    Keep doing what you’re doing. You’re on the right path.

  10. Longjumping-Pair2918 Avatar

    Bitcoin. Call dad. Call mom.

  11. BirdiesAndBrews Avatar

    Listen to what your gut tells you about people.

    Take care of your body and find some physical activities you enjoy.

    Brush and floss your teeth and goto the dentist twice a year.

    Don’t tolerate disrespect from people even if they have been in your life a very long time.

    Don’t be afraid of outgrowing friendships, people change a lot as we get older.

    People will say the right things, that’s easy. Look at their actions to truly tell you how they feel about you.

  12. Leionz Avatar

    Nothing will get better with time and it will only get harder the longer you wait.

    You are not useless or stupid, you’re inexperienced and young. No one expects you to know what to do when you’re new at something.

    You’re a better person than you think, and there are people who care about you.

    Find her.

    Edit: Not exactly advice, but it’s what I would have needed to hear back then.

  13. TJDG Avatar

    Wear ear protection at concerts. Wear sunscreen every day no matter what the weather.

    You need to be attractive, which means choosing clothes carefully, finding a barber you trust and dieting until you’re a healthy weight. Don’t go too far though, you need just a hint of a six pack. Starting relationships with strangers is 80% physical attractiveness. Realise that you will be rejected hundreds of times unless you’re literally Hollywood actor hot.

    At work, your job is to make your manager feel correct about things. Your actual skill/ability is irrelevant. Education is about signalling to people that don’t have it, don’t expect anything you’ve learned to be that useful.

    Most problems in the world are people problems, not technical ones, and are best solved by charismatic politicians. Contribute to your community.

    The world is a bit shit, connecting to other people is really the only thing worth trying to do. All things done alone get stale eventually. Try not to get rejected so much you give up, because if you give up on others, there’s not really much left to live for.

  14. natty1212 Avatar

    It’s not getting better.

  15. BooRadley_Esq Avatar

    Quit the dead end factory work, get a real education.

  16. biblio_phobic Avatar

    You don’t need to work your forever job in your 20s. Careers are not linear. Explore, learn and expand.

    Yes it’s possible you are not the right person for the job, but that doesn’t mean you need to feel guilty.

  17. velvetGranite_93 Avatar

    Life is what happens while you wait– but you still have to wait.

    Also try harder to move out of home

  18. Korvin-lin-sognar Avatar

    The best time to start investing is yesterday. The second best time is today.

  19. weesiwel Avatar

    Just die now it’ll save the pain and nothing ever works out anyway.

  20. Apotropaic-Pineapple Avatar

    Live below your means and save the rest.

    Lift weights, eat a clean diet, walk a lot.

    Your brain hasn’t fully matured yet, even if you’re book smart. Ask respectable and successful older men for their advice if you want to make a big decision, just to get their input.

    Don’t get tattoos when you’re young (I never did).

    Avoid vapes, smoking, drugs, and alcohol. A glass of wine is one thing, but recreational drinking is a waste of money and time.

    You become who you hang out with, so be careful with whom you keep company.

  21. agree_to_disconcur Avatar

    Don’t join the military.

  22. Ibraheem_moizoos Avatar

    Stay the course, you’re doing super.

  23. DrVoltage1 Avatar

    No matter what you do, you still get fucked over. Some people just can’t win.

  24. SquallkLeon Avatar

    Focus more on what you need to do, and less on what you want to do. It’s ok, even good, to have fun. It’s not OK to miss opportunities because you were too busy having fun to notice what passed you by.

  25. EidolonRook Avatar

    Keep working out. Never stop. Don’t bulk up but go super lean and fit. Every problem you have socially including employment will come as part of being overweight even if not obese.

  26. eo411 Avatar

    Don’t drink alcohol ever

  27. Dick_Grimes Avatar

    Whatever you start building now, will have results farther down the line than starting in your 30s.

    Start saving money now, your nest egg will be exponentially bigger by 50.

    If you start caring for your body (gym, food, teeth, etc) now, it will be easier to keep the form and return to it 20 years from now. Starting the gym at 40 is hard and so is losing the weight.

    Start caring for your “self” mental, therapy, knowing your real worth. It will help with healing, resolving, and growing later on when you have been denied, dumped, cheated on, etc.

    Start the race of your life now. Full sprint on and then jog later. Your friends are walking or haven’t started. So get moving.

  28. Kimmosabe Avatar

    Stay In school. Do better drugs or none at all.

  29. ZeMole Avatar

    You do not need a new vehicle if the one you have paid off already still runs.

  30. CS_70 Avatar

    “Buy Apple stock.”

  31. dvda4us Avatar

    You are on your parents health insurance. Go find a primary care physician, and get properly medicated. Also, go see a therapist regularly.

  32. ichikhunt Avatar

    Money literally is the most important thing in the world until you have enough of it to be happy.

  33. DissposableRedShirt6 Avatar

    Take the time to tell the people you love that you love them.

  34. russwestgoat Avatar

    Your 20’s are about learning to build healthy habits. Don’t wait until your 30’s to do it with eating. You know the way you’re eating isn’t working so change it

  35. CaptainDadBod88 Avatar

    Don’t spend the majority of your 20s being a hermit. Build an exercise routine and stick with it. Go to therapy. Find a career that makes you happy, but also makes you good money. Start saving as much money as you can as early as you can.

  36. Hunterslane86 Avatar

    Don’t try to fix her.

  37. xPugsb4drugsx Avatar

    Do not trust blindly! Have multiple friends and ask for help if you need it 🙂 Good Luck Kid

  38. Eriz4x Avatar

    You have a dopamine disorder. You chase it in the moment and it’s kneecapping your ability to endure and see things in the long run. Slowdown. You have time. You don’t want to spend money on these videogames and you’ll regret it in 10 years.
    You have a right to be yourself. You don’t have to adapt to everyone. Also, it’s okay to take space.

  39. clamchowderz Avatar

    If you want to look good, try a 30 day no sugar challenge. See and feel how different everything is at the end. It may change your life. And what’s 30 days? You’re in your 20s…

  40. zirlatovic Avatar
    • Don’t spend all your time at home. Life is outside

    • Don’t trust anyone.

    • Faber Est Suae Quisque Fortunae

    • Make routines.

    • Force yourself. Challenge your boundaries

  41. DamarsLastKanar Avatar

    She’ll probably say yes if you ask nicely.

  42. Business-League7728 Avatar

    Don’t invest in friendships/relationships with people that aren’t worth it. Don’t be scared of hurting someone’s feelings by saying no. Save earlier. Invest more time into hobbies. Learn more. Skip the drinking.

  43. ass-to-trout12 Avatar

    Selling drugs is not a viable career path long term. I know its super fun, and its great right now, but in 18 months or so, youre going to seriously regret this. Cash out now

  44. Nuhulti Avatar

    But up all the Apple stock that you can and hold onto it Until 2025, then transfer it over to me

  45. MouseAfraid9784 Avatar

    Don’t stop exercising.

  46. TNTournahu Avatar

    Do less drugs, get a degree in marine biology, join the Coast Guard or join a union. Take my career more serious and less partying.

  47. grumblebeardo13 Avatar

    Nobody cares that you have a dead end office job. You’re 20, party more, enjoy life, breathe. No one is judging you but yourself.

  48. Self-MadeRmry Avatar

    Don’t get married or have kids until you know what you want in life and find someone that wants that same thing

  49. DistanceNo9001 Avatar

    when i was in my 20s, 2013, my good friend from med school told me to buy some bitcoin. he bought when it was 100-200 per coin. He paid off med school debt and is worth millions, with an m

  50. Smiley001987 Avatar

    Take care of your body and let people go that aren’t worth it.

  51. platypusaurusrex Avatar

    Don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

    Start investing (401k, IRAs ETFs, etc.) even if it’s $10 a month. Compounding interest is the closest thing to magic in this world.

    It gets better.

  52. Sabbathius Avatar

    I wish I took my health more seriously.

    At 20 you think you’re immortal and you’re gonna live forever, young and fit. And that’s just not the case. You only have one body, and most of the things that break cannot be fixed, no matter what modern medicine says. Most of the damage is permanent. They can’t grow you a new tooth, they can only screw in a fake one into your jawbone, which is not the same thing. If you blow out your O-ring, they can do some damage control, but there’s limits. Your eyes, your hearing, your skin. You need to protect it all! Sunglasses, turn down the volume, wear a hat, etc.

    But no 20 year old is going to do that. And by the time you’re 40-50 and start to do it, it’s too late, the damage is already done.

  53. RajaKuman Avatar

    Make sure to pamper yourself every now and then. Sleep well. Exercise.

  54. VegaGT-VZ Avatar

    Focus on hobbies that center around progress, building skills, experiencing stuff vs just buying shit. Example for me is my fitness vs building cars.

    Also if you make $5, invest at least $1. Make it automatic so you don’t even think about it. The earlier you get used to living within your means the better, and in your 20s time is on your side.

  55. toephu Avatar

    My brother died when I was 28. My advice would be to make an effort to spend more time with him, even though he was annoying sometimes.

  56. ShamefulWatching Avatar

    Stop being afraid of love, stop pushing it away.

  57. PsychologicalLeg2416 Avatar

    ‘Shes not the one dude’

  58. ProfessorOilNGas Avatar

    Old me to young me:

    (1) Ditch any kind of religion – they all make you do at least one stupid thing.

    (2) Stay single – When I see what I could have pulled and how that would have affected my life, I’m forever grateful I stayed alone.

    (3) Childfree – Related to the last one, it’s a job I would never have wanted and the results would have been unfortunate for all. There’s enough people in the world.

    (4) Save money – Getting through the day while spending the least amount of money is now a form of entertainment to me.

    (5) Play it safe – Calculated risks every now and again are certainly acceptable and maybe even necessary. But overall, I have always played it safe and that’s helped to avoid any big disasters in my life.

    (6) Be myself – This one is certainly going to be a bit controversial as I’ve seen it listed as some of the worst advice you can give somebody. But for me, it has always paid off. After changes upon changes, I am more or less the same.

    (7) No smoking, controlled drinking, no drugs, no gambling.

    (8) Continue to work – I carefully climbed the slope to the exact job I wanted and I’m going to hang onto it until they wheel me into assisted living. Retirement? Nope.

    (9) Don’t care about politics – I haven’t voted in decades and I simply don’t care what happens in the capital. The people that do really care always seem to me to be unhappy with only brief periods of triumphal peacocking when their color wins a round. I just hum along.

    (10) No debt (outside of a starter mortgage way back when) – Pretty obvious. 

  59. BThriillzz Avatar

    Do the thing that takes a while, eventually you’ll be 25 or 30, and wouldn’t it be better to have that degree, or have that experience if you started now, versus 5 or 10 years from now

  60. dox1842 Avatar

    Go see a nutritionist and have them review your diet. When I was 20 I would skip meals then eat fast food. I felt exhausted all the time.

    I now eat 6 meals a day and have had them reviewed by a nutritionist. I go to the gym for 90 minutes 6 days a week and go into work feeling energetic.

  61. sapper4lyfe Avatar

    Get a vasectomy

  62. Dizzy-Woodpecker7879 Avatar

    The grass is not greener on the other side

  63. redbeardnohands Avatar

    Cut your hair and get jacked you damn hippy!

  64. Terakahn Avatar

    Don’t get fired

  65. Ill-Ninja-8344 Avatar

    Leave the whore right now, and avoid relationships at any cost until you are past 40.

  66. yearsofpractice Avatar

    Hey OP. 49 year old married father of two. I’d tell myself the following:

    • Stop drinking alcohol now. It’s not possible to drink yourself happy. You’re using it wrong and cannot moderate, so just stop now.

    • Work is important, but do not let it define you. No matter how good or important you think you are, it can all be taken away from you in minutes.

    • Work is not a democracy or meritocracy. Learn how to deliver value and make your boss look good.

    • No matter what your brain tells you, you do not deserve to feel sad, desperate or frightened for no reason. When those feelings start in your thirties, get therapy immediately

    • If you want to be with attractive women, you have to be attractive yourself. Work on yourself – appearance, social skills and ensuring you’ve got good prospects and stable finances. Charming and cheeky only works on women in their early 20s.

    That’s it really. That’s what it took me decades to learn.

  67. MasonCooper42 Avatar

    Stay the fuck away from becca, Rachael and Amy.

    And here’s the biggest euromillions jackpot numbers. Go fix your life