What’s something guys flex, feeling it makes them appear masculine but in reality it has an opposite effect?
What’s something guys flex, feeling it makes them appear masculine but in reality it has an opposite effect?
r/AskMen
What’s something guys flex, feeling it makes them appear masculine but in reality it has an opposite effect?
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Bragging about promiscuity typically is an indicator for a multitude of deeper issues and insecurities imo
Speaking very disrespectfully about women
This doesn’t make you look like the macho super stud you think it does
It makes you look like a scared little boy
How sparsely they can live. ‘Hey guys look at me, I rented this 3BR loft in downtown and only furnished it with a 1960s console tv and a pizza box to sit on. Im such a man!’
Bragging
The “alpha” wanting to fight everything.
The fact that they are flexing at all.
If you have to brag about it, you’ve got issues.
Any shirt that tells the world how tough, or how loyal they are. So, most veteran tee shirts, and I am a veteran who had a short phase wearing them. Generally they say something about sheepdogs, maybe Spartans, and the dude rocking it is usually the type that runs out of breath just standing up.
Pretty badass for sure.
How great, influential, and important they are…
cue Tywin Lannister’s quote
The whole ‘I’m just brutally honest’ thing. Bro, you’re not honest, you’re just rude with a tagline.
Their car. It means nothing.
Loud cars/trucks, ego lifting/using steroids.
Not knowing how to parent their own children. Guys will say “I don’t know how change a diaper,” or “i have no idea how to do my daughter’s hair” like it’s a flex.
Cool, bud. Either you’re incompetent, you’re lazy, or you’re an asshole
When they buy a “manly” car like a used WRX or whatever and they flex about how fast it is and how good it sounds. Yet they don’t even know how to change a tire or do anything on it.
“Alpha” stuff. Punisher stickers and shirts. Proud Boy bravado, same for III. Lifted trucks with all the lights and stickers, and off road equipment. Especially if they never get dirty. Trying to fight people.
Talking about body count or just how much sex they are having in general. Here and there, sure. Making it the topic of all conversation…I start thinking something is off.
2 of the 3 younger guys at work like to brag about how they’ll beat anyone’s ass over anything. Those guys try to sound hard in front of the secretary, but they’re built like bean stalks and throw some of the slowest punches Iv ever seen. They’ll try to shadow box while bragging to the ladies here, and it just comes off as childish
Caring about professional athletes
None of these men on the football field even know you exist, why give them so much attention and power?
I know a dude that brags about how popular and how much of a bully he was in high school. He talks about these crazy fights hes been in and how people were scared of him. Besides being almost 30 and it being lame, hes full of shit. I was in his graduating class and its the furthest thing from the truth.
Im not saying hes a wimp or anything but hes convinced all these people are scared of him and he looks like an idiot.
Cars, vanity muscles, amount of sex they’ve had, homophobic and misogynistic viewpoints, how tough they are… It’s a long list. Most men are clowns.
A coworker once bragged to me that he never apologized to his wife for anything. Even if he knew he was wrong about something, he would always word his apologies in a gaslighting type of way, like “I’m sorry you felt that way about what I said.” Their marriage lasted less than a year.
Being drunk – you act and sound like a child.
The more drunk you are, the more immature you appear.
The fact that they flex at all.
A needlessly large and loud truck and an obsession over military grade firearms/LARPing.
I’m a car guy, and a firearms enthusiast to some extent. But y’all know exactly who I’m talking about when I say these guys positively radiant insecurity and weakness.
Ragging your car and driving like a prick. Have a guy at work who has a nice car but he always parks where the highest footfall is coming in and out of the office, clearly to just show off. He’s always out first to his car to rag it at the end of the day so everyone can hear and see him in it, as if he’s overcompensating for his tiny cock.
The more inane stuff they try to brag about the worse he effect.
Size of fists, size of butts, length of arms, etc
The list is endless. It so prevalent everywhere. Its basically a human response. I am in the construction industry which is chock full of compensation for childhood/adolescent insecurities. I actually kinda feel bad for the person when i see them overcompensating because I know deep inside there is a desperate human just trying to be accepted.
insert alpha male mentality
Wearing sports jerseys. You’re wearing a costume, dude.
Working more than 40 hours a week including weekends because they’re all about the grind.
When they’re old they are gonna regret not taking breaks and enjoying life.
How much money they make
Cars
Inability to express or process emotions. Inability to be vulnerable. Super aggressive driving. Getting aggressive with other men out of jealousy. Being super muscular and into the gym. The list is endless really.
Money, cars, women. Bragging.
Vanity. Toys. If all you are is money, who are you without it? Does anyone actually like you?
Ironically, thinking hustle culture and grinding is healthy. Same for being shredded, steroids.
It just tells me that person is obsessed with appearance and quite likely thinks much less about other people.
Usually deeply insecure and projecting.
Cars, income, clothes, home…. in the end, noone gives a shit if you’re a douchebag.
Bragging about doing traditionally non-masculine things like baking or playing dress up with their daughter or any number of other examples. You’re supposed to be a well rounded person. You’re supposed to be a good father. These aren’t something to do and then point at and go “Look at that! Look how different I am! Doesn’t that make me such a man that I’m doing these things? Please tell me I’m special.”
When they are with attractive women with bad vibes
Driving a large pickup truck – ram, f-series, tundra, etc
Thinking it’s cool to fight and be aggressive with other dudes. In my early 20’s, I used to often get into fights and confront other guys if I felt like they had wronged me somehow. I thought it made me look cool and tough. As a 34 year old man, I now realize that that attitude and the fighting came from a place of insecurity. I wasn’t secure enough in myself as a man so I felt like I had to try to look “tough” which in turn would make me look “manly”. It was idiotic and got me into situations that I should not have been in. You get older and learn to brush things off and not join idiots when they’re doing stupid things. If you join them, now there are two idiots.
I see a lot of social media posts from Andrew Tate popping up on reddit and that guy is the complete opposite of masculine. Like, he has absolutely no clue what it means to be a man.
But the whole “Alpha Male” thing is like that. It’s like a bunch of wussies, to use the vernacular of my generation, got together and made up a weird Leveling system like in D&D and then announced that they were on the top of it. But pretty much every single thing they say and do makes them look like bigger and bigger wimps and crybabies.
Driving a jeep or a big lifted loud truck
Penis measuring/pissing contests. Implying someone is less of a man because they made a different decision than you did, have a different preference than you do. Some people are obnoxious I get that, but there’s just a lot of unnecessary hate.
Lifted truck
High body count
Being aggressive
A better question is what doesn’t do this? The need to “flex” at all always makes me think they’re insecure
Misogyny.
Flexing
Walking in a straight line purposefully bumping into others or not making room for others to walk by them… peak insecurity haha.
Their car/salary. It has precisely zero effect on how attractive they are to me.
Pretty much all masculine flexing fits this description in my opinion. Real self confidence means never having to brag.
talking louder / overtalking to make people think they’re smart(er)
Trying to lead in every situation. Sometimes you need a leader and sometimes you need people to follow.
If you’re too insecure to notice when it best to shut up and do what your told that doesn’t make you look manly.
Going to strip clubs. It’s the gayest shit ever. “Hey, let’s all go get boners together!”
Loud exausts and revving engines.
the opposite of appearing masculine is appearing feminine, so the only thing I can think of is when a man goes into a rage over something minor and just looks like he has wicked PMS.
Broadcasting pretty much all of the things you think of as flexing. If he’s needs you to know he’s insecure and has his identity wrapped up in superficial things. He doesn’t even know himself to be secure in himself.
How a dude drives is a pretty good litmus test for this type of thing.
Are they constantly tailriding people? Get roadrage easily? Think they are above following traffic laws? Revving their engines/making an ungodly amount of noise with their car while at the same time thinking all of it is funny/cool/not a big deal?
Those aren’t men. They’re lonely boys who are still trying to show off for a made-up captive audience. It’s not cute, it’s not attractive, and we all share “the look” when one of those douches does any of it within earshot/eyesight.
Lifted and/or wide stance trucks, especially on big wheels. They scream “I’m willing to sacrifice utility for appearance because I never do any actual work with my truck.”
Aggression
Flaunting how much money they make and how much they paid for the previous girlfriend (holidays, rent, etc). I find it very tacky and immediately unattractive EDIT: misspelling
Politics. Flexing their moral superiority.
How many girls they’ve had relations with.
How big their dick is.
How muscular they are.
One upping (my father in-law, ugh)
Their bank account/income.
Bragging about their car. No having a sports car or a truck doesn’t make you more of a man than any other man.
Loud ass cars
Wearing a pair of Oakleigh sunglasses ontop of their hat or hanging it backwards on the back of their head.
I was at a mountain temple yesterday an hour outside of Chiang Mai. A busload of meatheads were doing pull ups on the back frame of a jeep that had ferried them up from the visitor parking lot
Thankfully, they were speaking Spanish
Bragging about money
Fashion labels
No man has ever made himself more manly by flexing on what brand his suit is or what label is on his shoes
This should be in ask women
Dominance
Big truck or Harley Davidson.
Being “Alpha” lol