Years ago, someone I barely knew said, “You’re allowed to outgrow people, even if you once prayed to have them in your life.” It hit me harder than I expected, and I’ve carried it with me ever since. It made me realize that not every relationship is meant to last forever, and that letting go isn’t always about anger or bitterness — sometimes it’s just growth. That one line helped me walk away from a few situations that were quietly breaking me.
When I was a kid in recreational basketball, our team beat another team. I talked shit to some random kid I didnt know and all he said was “so, it doesnt matter.” and walked away. I didnt get any satisfaction from talking shit and I just felt like a asshole expressing considering I didnt even score lol. That kid taught me a lesson that stayed with me.
Literally any nice compliment I get about my appearance from another girl. I’m sure there’s some unpacking to do there, but it just makes my day and weeks to come!
A coworker once told me, gently: “No one is going to name the building after you.”
At the time, I was burning myself out—skipping meals, barely sleeping, working nonstop. That one comment hit hard and made me realize I was sacrificing my well-being for absolutely nothing. Now? I work just as much as I need to—for the same paycheck, but with a lot more peace.
One of my last patients before graduating as a nurse, 71 years old men, told me when I was 21 struggling with my then relationship, ‘you’re waaaaay too young to be dealing with that type of love bullshit’. ‘You’ve all your life ahead’. Damn! He saved me soooooo much trouble by making me see the world out of my then cult bubble. He got his euthanasia the next day. I’ll never forget his touch in one of my best life decisions, breaking my fiançailles and bursting the bubble.
My supervisor at a brand-new job that I’d never done before told me, “You don’t have to have all the answers, but you do need to know where to go to look for the answers.” It really made me more comfortable with saying “I don’t know” to people, which is very healing to the recovering gifted child.
“It’s okay to not talk to guys” said to me by a college professor after witnessing me be cornered by a guy who really loved the sound of his own voice.
At a birthday party, my friend’s Haitian grandfather told me, “When you are young, life is a blank page—it’s exciting. What you don’t know yet is that you won’t be the only one writing on it.”
It stuck with me. A quiet reminder that while we may hold the pen, others will leave their marks too.
At a birthday party, my friend’s Haitian grandfather told me, “When you are young, life is a blank page—it’s exciting. What you don’t know yet is that you won’t be the only one writing on it.”
It stuck with me. A quiet reminder that while we may hold the pen, others will leave their marks too.
“Always aim for heaven, for even if you fall, you’ll still fall among the stars.”
A dear departed friend said this to me ages ago while we were at a Van Gogh exhibition. I would later learn that it was a variation of a similar quote by Oscar Wilde, but I’ll always love the quote I was given.
It was prom night, and it was being held at a convention centre. My parents and I rushed over to the nearest elevator – a man had just stepped out of the elevator. He stopped, looked at me, smiling and said: ‘You look beautiful and congratulations.’ And then he left.
My college professor said “ if others take 5 years you’d take 10 years for the same degree” I’m a slow learner, I was aware and working on it but that cemented my already low self confidence
Was sitting on a bench outside the front entrance of a hotel with my now husband. Older woman walked past us into the hotel entrance, then makes a 180 and approaches us.
She points at me and says to my husband, “She’s going to take good care of you one day.” Then she walks back in the hotel with no further explanation.
My husband and I were just hooking up at the time and nothing serious, so we found it odd. But we both still remember that moment and believe she may have been a medium of some kind. There was something powerful about that interaction that I get the chills every time I think about it.
A wise and well-established manager I had at a factory job decades ago. On a day when everyone’s direct deposit was screwed up and none of us got paid on pay day.
He knew most of the employees were very much living paycheque to paycheque and he was always so good to advocate for his people. He’s still at the top of the list of my most respected managers. He’s a gem of a human.
At the very end of high school, one of my friends told me that I was physically built like a real life version of Homer Simpson. I haven’t been able to unsee it, and I kinda hate it but think it’s funny at the same time
I’ve gained a lot of weight in the many years since then, but have started losing it since the weight loss surgery I had this past December. I was 400 pounds even at my heaviest, and was closer to Peter Griffin status minus the diabetes and ballsack chin. I’m now approaching 310 pounds in Homer territory again, and I’m feeling much better than ever before.
Funnily enough, if I were to grow out my beard/facial hair, it looks best as a goatee. I’ve tried a full beard, but it just looks worse by comparison. So I guess Homer Simpson was a good choice. Only strange thing is that I have a full head of very dense hair. I’m not going bald any time soon, but baldness does run in the family
I’ve also been gluten free for years, and I have missed donuts more than anything else
Back when I was in university, I’d often walk through this small park near campus. One day, this elderly woman stopped me and asked, “Why do you look so scared?” I was completely thrown off and didn’t know how to respond, but that question stuck with me. It made me realize how much fear was controlling me. I started pushing myself out of my comfort zone after that. Funny how one random comment can change your whole outlook
I was 20 at the time, worried about what I was going to do with myself, with my life. An older person, someone who was practically a stranger, said to me: “Look at it this way. From the moment you were born, couldn’t even hold your own head up, through your whole childhood, adolescence, teenagehood to now has only been 20 years. Think about how much happened in that span of time, how much changed. From a newborn to 20. You get to do that two more times, if not three. 40, 60, maybe even 80. You have time, don’t worry so much.”
I was the drummer in a metal band in high school and had hair down to the middle of my back to complement the headbanging. The girl I was seeing at the time asked me to go with her to the hospice unit to see her grandfather who was on his last few days, though I’d never met him before. Walked in, she introduced me and all he says is “That’s your boyfriend? I thought he was a girl.. no, really, he’s a guy?” before nodding off. It was the last thing he said before passing away the next day.
Haven’t forgotten about it nearly 18 years later and still get a good laugh out of it every now and then.
I was celebrating my birthday alone in London as a gift, at a restaurant with an amazing view. It was a dream but I still felt a little lonely, until two girls sent me a glass of champagne because they loved my energy. It made my night
Someone once told me, ‘You don’t have to prove your worth to people who’ve already made up their minds about you.’ It hit me hard at the time and still helps me keep my boundaries in check
I was once venting to a friend about feeling like I was falling behind comparing myself to peers who seemed to have their lives together. Without missing a beat, they said:
“Everyone’s just figuring it out as they go. Some are just better at pretending they aren’t.”
They continued sipping their coffee, and the conversation moved on. But that line stuck with me. It was a reminder that the polished exteriors we often see don’t reflect the internal struggles everyone faces.
My dad told me in passing once when we was going through it, “we choose our pain.” Like you can experience the pain of success, all the hard work, torn muscles, failure leading up to a big break etc or we can experience the pain of complacency, laziness, and lack of fulfillment.
At my Bat Mitzvah, after I finished my haftorah, the Rabbi came up to me to give me a congratulatory hug. Then she whispered in my ear, “You sing like an angel”
After that, I had the confidence to start singing in public. I went on to become a classically trained singer.
Years ago, a buddy of mine told me: “You know what your problem is? You think you’re average, and hold others to that standard.”
He did not mean I considered myself better than others, I should say. More that I was doomed to the perpetual disappointment of having set what seemed to me to be reasonable goals and minimums, only to have them consistently go unmet. He was not wrong. Trouble is, I have very little concept of self, which makes it a difficult perspective to shake. I have never had issues with self-esteem, because the idea of it feels to me like becoming overly invested in one’s own headcanon.
A different friend, in college, once described me as “inimitable.” It is an unfortunate thing, I think. I took it as a grand compliment at the time, of course; who wouldn’t want to be unique? It’s a very interesting thing to be, after all. From the outside, anyway. From within, it is isolating in its mundanity. Suspect this is related to my autism.
“What’s anxious mean?” from a little girl walking by with her mom inquiring why I seemed uncomfortable. All I could think for awhile after that was “wow I wish I could remember a time when I didn’t know anxiety….”
“this is your real life, not a movie. Stop choosing people like this” -My best friend, after I dated 2 dramatic, overly emotional men who brought nothing but chaos to my life.
A lyric from a song called ‘Big Energy’ by Ladipoe, a Nigerian artist. The entire song is him gassing himself up but that line really stuck with me and I remember it a lot when I’m on hard time.
A former friend told me that he would never cheat on his significant other for selfish reasons and not because he cared about his SO’s feelings. He believed, that people only view the world through their own experiences. So if he cheated, then that means other people could easily cheat on him or he would attract a lot of cheaters in his life. However, if he doesn’t cheat then there are like-minded individuals who won’t cheat either and he just needs to date those people.
Later, I realized he was a psychopath. But I thought that was a very unique way to look at cheating
I have social anxiety. One time, I was in the wrong office building, and a guy asked me what I was looking for. I was flustered and struggling to get my answer out. The guy simply said, “take you time,” and I immediately felt calm. Many years later, I still think about that periodically.
My aunt once told 12 or 13 year old me that it’s okay to develop « healthy selfishness ». It’s something I still think about a lot 20 years later and have trouble finding what is « healthy » as I constantly feel that thinking about me to any degree is selfish.
My old Executive Director told us once on a random busy Friday, “There will always be work on Monday. If we didn’t have work, we wouldn’t be in business. Go home.” and I keep that with me. I only do overtime when absolutely necessary, but if not, I just do my work for the day and whatever I don’t get done, I do it the next day because there will always be work to do.
a girl in school destroyed my art out of jealousy. i cried and went to the teacher.
she said “the first thing you should do is not cry because that is exactly what she wanted you to do, and now you’ve given her the satisfaction of seeing you cry.” i was like fffffffffff
Comments
Anytime someone has mentioned I gained weight
A guy at a party once told me, ‘You’re the kind of person people write characters about.’ I still think about that when I feel invisible.
Youre a full grown man
Stop letting boys mess with you😅
Someone called me a dimmer switch. I guess as an insult but I’m not sure.
A college professor once said to me: It doesn’t matter how fast you go, as long as you don’t stop.
I thought sex with you would be more interesting.
That one stung pretty damn hard.
Years ago, someone I barely knew said, “You’re allowed to outgrow people, even if you once prayed to have them in your life.” It hit me harder than I expected, and I’ve carried it with me ever since. It made me realize that not every relationship is meant to last forever, and that letting go isn’t always about anger or bitterness — sometimes it’s just growth. That one line helped me walk away from a few situations that were quietly breaking me.
When I was a kid in recreational basketball, our team beat another team. I talked shit to some random kid I didnt know and all he said was “so, it doesnt matter.” and walked away. I didnt get any satisfaction from talking shit and I just felt like a asshole expressing considering I didnt even score lol. That kid taught me a lesson that stayed with me.
Don’t look back, it’s not the way your going –
I still follow that after 50 years
Recently got told I’m weak and submissive. Can tell that’s gonna stick with me, for sure.
You can’t be everything to everyone.
A senior commented once commented on my lack of social skills that i am very difficult.
And he is right i am very difficult, its hard.
Literally any nice compliment I get about my appearance from another girl. I’m sure there’s some unpacking to do there, but it just makes my day and weeks to come!
Are you wearing sunglasses to keep the rain out of your eyes?
A coworker once told me, gently: “No one is going to name the building after you.”
At the time, I was burning myself out—skipping meals, barely sleeping, working nonstop. That one comment hit hard and made me realize I was sacrificing my well-being for absolutely nothing. Now? I work just as much as I need to—for the same paycheck, but with a lot more peace.
One of my last patients before graduating as a nurse, 71 years old men, told me when I was 21 struggling with my then relationship, ‘you’re waaaaay too young to be dealing with that type of love bullshit’. ‘You’ve all your life ahead’. Damn! He saved me soooooo much trouble by making me see the world out of my then cult bubble. He got his euthanasia the next day. I’ll never forget his touch in one of my best life decisions, breaking my fiançailles and bursting the bubble.
“You’re the type of woman men don’t like for fun, they’ll choose you to start a family.”
Thanks Lady, 13 years later still haven’t been choosen
My supervisor at a brand-new job that I’d never done before told me, “You don’t have to have all the answers, but you do need to know where to go to look for the answers.” It really made me more comfortable with saying “I don’t know” to people, which is very healing to the recovering gifted child.
“Hey, I like your hat!” – some random dude in Austin, Texas while I was on a trip there with my friend.
Be kind. Everyone’s fighting battles you’ll never see.” Still echoes in my head every single day
“It’s okay to not talk to guys” said to me by a college professor after witnessing me be cornered by a guy who really loved the sound of his own voice.
“I don’t have to do anything” I told my Rasta neighbor he had to try my banana bread 😭
I asked an old hippie how he could take 1000 mcg hit of lsd and drive around San Francisco in the 60s, with a manual transmission.
He told me, “no matter what, what’s 5 feet in front of you is what’s 5 feet infront if you,”.
I then believed I could do what he could do. And driving on high doses of psycadelics was never a problem again.
I learned the only thing holding me back from my potential was me.
And that lack of confidence makes possible tasks impossible.
At a birthday party, my friend’s Haitian grandfather told me, “When you are young, life is a blank page—it’s exciting. What you don’t know yet is that you won’t be the only one writing on it.”
It stuck with me. A quiet reminder that while we may hold the pen, others will leave their marks too.
These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb 🧗
“ you’re not as smart as the others, you’ll have to try harder”.
At a birthday party, my friend’s Haitian grandfather told me, “When you are young, life is a blank page—it’s exciting. What you don’t know yet is that you won’t be the only one writing on it.”
It stuck with me. A quiet reminder that while we may hold the pen, others will leave their marks too.
No job is beneath you, no job shouldd make you feel shame.
you should feel shame if you are stealing
“Always aim for heaven, for even if you fall, you’ll still fall among the stars.”
A dear departed friend said this to me ages ago while we were at a Van Gogh exhibition. I would later learn that it was a variation of a similar quote by Oscar Wilde, but I’ll always love the quote I was given.
It was prom night, and it was being held at a convention centre. My parents and I rushed over to the nearest elevator – a man had just stepped out of the elevator. He stopped, looked at me, smiling and said: ‘You look beautiful and congratulations.’ And then he left.
Don’t take criticism from someone you wouldn’t take advice from.
My college professor said “ if others take 5 years you’d take 10 years for the same degree” I’m a slow learner, I was aware and working on it but that cemented my already low self confidence
Was sitting on a bench outside the front entrance of a hotel with my now husband. Older woman walked past us into the hotel entrance, then makes a 180 and approaches us.
She points at me and says to my husband, “She’s going to take good care of you one day.” Then she walks back in the hotel with no further explanation.
My husband and I were just hooking up at the time and nothing serious, so we found it odd. But we both still remember that moment and believe she may have been a medium of some kind. There was something powerful about that interaction that I get the chills every time I think about it.
You’ve made it this far, why give up now?
The wise words from a dementia patient in a psych ward I was put in after attempting suicide
“You don’t fuck with people’s money.”
A wise and well-established manager I had at a factory job decades ago. On a day when everyone’s direct deposit was screwed up and none of us got paid on pay day.
He knew most of the employees were very much living paycheque to paycheque and he was always so good to advocate for his people. He’s still at the top of the list of my most respected managers. He’s a gem of a human.
At the very end of high school, one of my friends told me that I was physically built like a real life version of Homer Simpson. I haven’t been able to unsee it, and I kinda hate it but think it’s funny at the same time
I’ve gained a lot of weight in the many years since then, but have started losing it since the weight loss surgery I had this past December. I was 400 pounds even at my heaviest, and was closer to Peter Griffin status minus the diabetes and ballsack chin. I’m now approaching 310 pounds in Homer territory again, and I’m feeling much better than ever before.
Funnily enough, if I were to grow out my beard/facial hair, it looks best as a goatee. I’ve tried a full beard, but it just looks worse by comparison. So I guess Homer Simpson was a good choice. Only strange thing is that I have a full head of very dense hair. I’m not going bald any time soon, but baldness does run in the family
I’ve also been gluten free for years, and I have missed donuts more than anything else
Back when I was in university, I’d often walk through this small park near campus. One day, this elderly woman stopped me and asked, “Why do you look so scared?” I was completely thrown off and didn’t know how to respond, but that question stuck with me. It made me realize how much fear was controlling me. I started pushing myself out of my comfort zone after that. Funny how one random comment can change your whole outlook
I was 20 at the time, worried about what I was going to do with myself, with my life. An older person, someone who was practically a stranger, said to me: “Look at it this way. From the moment you were born, couldn’t even hold your own head up, through your whole childhood, adolescence, teenagehood to now has only been 20 years. Think about how much happened in that span of time, how much changed. From a newborn to 20. You get to do that two more times, if not three. 40, 60, maybe even 80. You have time, don’t worry so much.”
Be nice to people on the way up because you’re going to see the same people on the way down
“He doesn’t likes you because you remind him of him” lol
How is it there’s never time to do things right, but always time to do them over?
That “life’s too short to pretend not to care/play nonchalant”
You don’t have to earn rest
“All that talent wasted on you” – coworker who was watching me draw co.ic art in the break room.
I used to fill sketchbook after sketchbook. I haven’t really drawn much since he said that. :/
“Was that you who farted in aisle 6?”
All you have is your word.
I was the drummer in a metal band in high school and had hair down to the middle of my back to complement the headbanging. The girl I was seeing at the time asked me to go with her to the hospice unit to see her grandfather who was on his last few days, though I’d never met him before. Walked in, she introduced me and all he says is “That’s your boyfriend? I thought he was a girl.. no, really, he’s a guy?” before nodding off. It was the last thing he said before passing away the next day.
Haven’t forgotten about it nearly 18 years later and still get a good laugh out of it every now and then.
I was celebrating my birthday alone in London as a gift, at a restaurant with an amazing view. It was a dream but I still felt a little lonely, until two girls sent me a glass of champagne because they loved my energy. It made my night
“Hey, do you go to this school?”
“Yeah”
“Tell your professors ‘FUCK YOU’!”
-Homeless couple eating a 7-11 pizza on a bench by my college.
Good times! I wish them many pizzas and much meth.
Competition can lead to innovation, but it also breeds deception.
No benevolent, wise extraterrestrial race would be in our world while humanity is still divided as a species.
Someone once told me, ‘You don’t have to prove your worth to people who’ve already made up their minds about you.’ It hit me hard at the time and still helps me keep my boundaries in check
I was once venting to a friend about feeling like I was falling behind comparing myself to peers who seemed to have their lives together. Without missing a beat, they said:
“Everyone’s just figuring it out as they go. Some are just better at pretending they aren’t.”
They continued sipping their coffee, and the conversation moved on. But that line stuck with me. It was a reminder that the polished exteriors we often see don’t reflect the internal struggles everyone faces.
My dad told me in passing once when we was going through it, “we choose our pain.” Like you can experience the pain of success, all the hard work, torn muscles, failure leading up to a big break etc or we can experience the pain of complacency, laziness, and lack of fulfillment.
Everybody is so obsessed by themselves they never remember all these things you beat yourself up over
It gave me permission to be me
About 20 years ago a stranger complimented my eyes. I was confused at the time but I still think about that intermittently.
“You have the glutes of a goddess”
At my Bat Mitzvah, after I finished my haftorah, the Rabbi came up to me to give me a congratulatory hug. Then she whispered in my ear, “You sing like an angel”
After that, I had the confidence to start singing in public. I went on to become a classically trained singer.
“Sometimes the thing that’s meant to happen isn’t the thing we want to happen.”
“Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.”
A simple “I love you” from my great aunt the last time I saw her alive
This too shall pass.
You’re twice the men the people who call you a pussy are cause you fought every second to be seen as one (I’m a trans guy for the record)
“Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.” simple, but it changed how I approach everything.
Years ago, a buddy of mine told me: “You know what your problem is? You think you’re average, and hold others to that standard.”
He did not mean I considered myself better than others, I should say. More that I was doomed to the perpetual disappointment of having set what seemed to me to be reasonable goals and minimums, only to have them consistently go unmet. He was not wrong. Trouble is, I have very little concept of self, which makes it a difficult perspective to shake. I have never had issues with self-esteem, because the idea of it feels to me like becoming overly invested in one’s own headcanon.
A different friend, in college, once described me as “inimitable.” It is an unfortunate thing, I think. I took it as a grand compliment at the time, of course; who wouldn’t want to be unique? It’s a very interesting thing to be, after all. From the outside, anyway. From within, it is isolating in its mundanity. Suspect this is related to my autism.
“What’s anxious mean?” from a little girl walking by with her mom inquiring why I seemed uncomfortable. All I could think for awhile after that was “wow I wish I could remember a time when I didn’t know anxiety….”
“this is your real life, not a movie. Stop choosing people like this” -My best friend, after I dated 2 dramatic, overly emotional men who brought nothing but chaos to my life.
‘We didn’t come this far to come this far.’
A lyric from a song called ‘Big Energy’ by Ladipoe, a Nigerian artist. The entire song is him gassing himself up but that line really stuck with me and I remember it a lot when I’m on hard time.
“Focus on the present, that’s the only way your future can be beautiful. Worrying about what’s gonna happen tomorrow won’t help.”
Guy told me I was running in circles. He said I was running really fast and I looked really impressive, but I was running in circles.
A former friend told me that he would never cheat on his significant other for selfish reasons and not because he cared about his SO’s feelings. He believed, that people only view the world through their own experiences. So if he cheated, then that means other people could easily cheat on him or he would attract a lot of cheaters in his life. However, if he doesn’t cheat then there are like-minded individuals who won’t cheat either and he just needs to date those people.
Later, I realized he was a psychopath. But I thought that was a very unique way to look at cheating
One of my lecturers told me she cared about me and wanted me to succeed. That saved my life and allowed me to continue my degree
“Ain’t they a lovely pair”
Said to 19yo me, while I was smiling naively and waiting to hear what the very elderly man was saying to me.
A random person came to me in restaurants and said “stop trying to scare me it won’t work on me” I wasn’t even looking at him for a long period.
A teacher i had always said: “If you succeed on your first try, you got lucky. Do it again.”
I have social anxiety. One time, I was in the wrong office building, and a guy asked me what I was looking for. I was flustered and struggling to get my answer out. The guy simply said, “take you time,” and I immediately felt calm. Many years later, I still think about that periodically.
My manager told me that choosing a good direction is more important than working hard
“Graveyards are full of people that thought they were indispensable.”
How their words make me feel? That’s on me. This was a – oh, you made me feel bad, type of scenario. I was early teens. Excellent lesson.
Always judge people how you find them not how others find them
I once had a great boss who told me: Focus on the journey, not just the destination. Progress is what matters.
My aunt once told 12 or 13 year old me that it’s okay to develop « healthy selfishness ». It’s something I still think about a lot 20 years later and have trouble finding what is « healthy » as I constantly feel that thinking about me to any degree is selfish.
My brother told me I’m a waste of God’s creation
You’ll never be younger than you are right now.
You’re going to be the villain in someone’s story no matter what you do or how you live.
My old Executive Director told us once on a random busy Friday, “There will always be work on Monday. If we didn’t have work, we wouldn’t be in business. Go home.” and I keep that with me. I only do overtime when absolutely necessary, but if not, I just do my work for the day and whatever I don’t get done, I do it the next day because there will always be work to do.
a girl in school destroyed my art out of jealousy. i cried and went to the teacher.
she said “the first thing you should do is not cry because that is exactly what she wanted you to do, and now you’ve given her the satisfaction of seeing you cry.” i was like fffffffffff
If you don’t remember a girl’s name, just say “Hey you” works every time… until she realizes you’ve been saying it for three weeks.
Technically not by someone I know, but a line from Dragon Age 2 actually, by a party member named Isabela: “they don’t know me, I know me.”
It left such a profound impression on me that it actually helped zap most of my self consciousness away.
“You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to.”
Heard it from a coworker during a heated meeting. Lives rent-free in my brain.