What’s your lone-wolf male behavior that feels primal and unnecessary but you absolutely must do it?

r/

I’ll go first. My wife makes fun of me for aggressively checking the locks at 12 AM like a medieval sentry doing perimeter patrol: shirtless, in boxer briefs, fully convinced I’m the last line of defense against imaginary threats.

Comments

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    I’ll go first. My wife makes fun of me for aggressively checking the locks at 12 AM like a medieval sentry doing perimeter patrol: shirtless, in boxer briefs, fully convinced I’m the last line of defense against imaginary threats.

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  2. VogueColossus Avatar

    Looking for items that I can’t find. I lost it alone, therefore I must hunt for it alone

  3. SockNo948 Avatar

    I don’t have any, I am not a wolf

  4. asymphonyin2parts Avatar

    Dude, that’s not lone-wolf behavior. That’s just anxiety.

  5. JSmith666 Avatar

    Groceries…i dont care how many bags…this is a one trip one person operation

  6. No_Nectarine6942 Avatar

    After so long I will have a borderline mental break if people are around,  I need time alone. After alone time I’m fine.

  7. iAmRookie72 Avatar

    I take my paintball ball gun and sweep through each room of the house aggressively to verify no spiders are lurking about

  8. 6twoRaptor Avatar

    I actually have cameras set up that I check at night so I don’t have to get up like you do. I guess mine would be just going for an extra drive to clear my mind before I get home. When I’m working late at night and driving home at 2/3 a.m. the city is dead asleep and you can catch the occasion bunny, owl, raccoon, and sometimes even a coyote. 

  9. FoppyDidNothingWrong Avatar

    3, 4 am, everyone is asleep execpt me. Just the stars and I.

    (I go to sleep at 8 😅)

  10. mrfarenh8th Avatar

    No get married. Ever. Have my own place… crazy I know, I made pieces with the fact that ill die alone. I love women, just not commitment and need my personal space.

  11. Striking-Rutabaga-87 Avatar

    I’m lone wolfing it through life

    it feels like i’m killing myself because humans are pack tribal monkeys but after my divorce I feel i’ll survive longer this way

  12. ShoemakerMicah Avatar

    I drive EVERYWHERE myself. With a couple exceptions of other drivers I truly feel safe with. Just did central Texas to upstate NY in two days….wife kept offering to drive…I just politely declined. Regularly drive cross country solo, sleep in car etc. dunno if this counts but…

  13. lngfellow45 Avatar

    I do the same. It’s my bedtime routine.

  14. xItaliax Avatar

    Running at night. Late. Clearing my head.

  15. ElectionSilent2577 Avatar

    I can easily answer this for my husband lol
    Similar to you, anybody who even walks NEAR our house… he’ll just stare out the window with a mean mug… like this 🤨

    Lmao it was like as soon as we moved into our house and had kids… boom… he’s on patrol

  16. korevis Avatar

    I do the midnight shirtless boxer patrol too.

  17. PaddywackShaq Avatar

    Suffering in silence

  18. BornToHulaToro Avatar

    Not engaging with people until someone absolutely dazzles me. Dazzle is a harsh term. Show me you’re a living person with a brain. I’ll go wolf along with you .

  19. Ok_Acanthisitta_9369 Avatar

    Same, but I like to add a “twelve o’clock and all’s well!” call-out after my patrol 😂

  20. LiveLongAndProspurr Avatar

    I have a nice tool, so I built a shed over it.

  21. Shrugsfortheconfuse Avatar

    Being independent even at the expense of better alternatives.

  22. yummysteel Avatar

    I have an axe, a crowbar, and a kukri by my bed in case of home invasion.

    I have a hammer and crowbar in my car for the same reason

    Sometimes I’ll take the kukri into the yard and clear some brush as a little break from work

  23. ColdCamel7 Avatar

    After any situation in which I’ve been required to be social at all, I need to get out on my own and just wander around a bit to wind down

  24. Ok_Acanthisitta_9369 Avatar

    I really love, once the sun has gone down and it’s dark out, putting on cozy dark pants and a dark hoodie and just sitting on the back deck to observe the comings and goings in our yard and on our neighborhood trails (we live in one of a couple houses at a large 4 way intersection of two of our neighborhood green space paths).

    It’s usually nice and cool out, and peaceful, and super relaxing. But I also like the feeling of being able to see everyone and everything coming past our backyard without being noticed. It’s like a pretend stakeout I do in the middle of the night pretty frequently.

    Whenever my wife notices she’s just like “there you are! What are you doing? It’s cold and dark out!”

    Sorry babe, I have a primal need to watch for potential predators stalking our shelter. 😎

  25. Cheesqueak Avatar

    Take long poop breaks. I mostly just fart periodically and browse Reddit

  26. platform_9 Avatar

    My favorite way to eat soup is cold and directly out of the can.

    My ideal mattress is best described as “the softest brick you can find.”

  27. DiggityDanksta Avatar

    If I hear the skittering of cockroach feet, I must hunt them down and kill them. I’ll smack them with a shoe if one is close by, or my bare hands if not. I can always wash my hands; I might not get another good shot at the roach.

  28. wellthatexplainsalot Avatar

    I cannot ignore people who need help. I can’t say what that ‘needs help’ is, but sometimes it will get triggered and I have to help. It happens with men and women and kids. More often with women than men, but it’s not exclusive. Some sort of protective gene. I don’t know though that it’s unnecessary.

  29. HarveyMushman72 Avatar

    Kevin McCallister mode activated.

  30. Go1den_State_Of_Mind Avatar

    Going for runs before anyone else is up or after everyone else asleep. It’s very refreshing to be alone with the entirety of all the “danger” we’re programmed to avoid.

    3am runs in a downtown area, no headphones, no phone – sheesh. Ready to conquer the world after that.

  31. Roguespiffy Avatar

    Thousand yard stare into whatever fire I build.

  32. No_Salad_68 Avatar

    I keep my hunting bow and a few broadheads under my bed. Also a tomohawk behind the bedside table.

  33. Strickland_FJ Avatar

    Going outside when it’s storming super bad or there’s tornado warnings and watching it. Makes me feel like a bad ass