When I was a child, I was a chronic chair sniffer.

r/

I don’t really know how this started, and I get gut punches of embarrassment whenever I remember, but as a kid (from like 5-9 years old) I would always smell the part of a chair that someone sits on. Whenever my parents would have guests over and they would get up from their seat and go somewhere else, I would then get up and sniff the seat bottom, out of pure, genuine curiosity. There was no other reasoning behind this other than childlike wonder. The scents were one of those things like gasoline or dog paws that don’t necessarily smell good, but you can’t stop smelling.

Comments

  1. Sad-Database3677 Avatar

    That reminds me of an old boss that told me that he used to smell bicycle seats.

  2. TheThreeSats Avatar

    I meant, it’s a little funny in a weird way but really not that awful I don’t guess. We are animals after all.

    When I was pregnant I never once had a food craving but I would brave smelling my dogs feet. Like couldn’t wait to get home from work and huff them like paint one day, couldn’t stop thinking about it. Lol never have wanted to do it before or after. You were a little kid at the time too. Kids to the weirdest things. One of my sons used to ask us to fart on him over and over when he was a toddler. And as I was laughing at that memory my husband me that one of our 6 year olds runs and smells his farts if my husband farts around him.

    Soooooo yea, you’re not the only one.

  3. Main-Elevator-6908 Avatar

    That’s incredibly disturbing.

  4. Prestigious-Gap-9380 Avatar

    We are animals to the core (and functioning on a very old hardware!). I think that was a primal behavior to protect yourself from the environment around you that is not very known to you (specially the guests that will feel like aliens to a very young person)

  5. MiraKyn_ Avatar

    Honestly? That’s just peak weird-kid behavior, and we all had something. The fact you can look back and laugh at it now shows you’ve grown. Childhood quirks don’t define you, they just make the memories richer.

  6. SummerOfMayhem Avatar

    We were all weird and curious kids with strange urges. Hey, even dogs do that one.

  7. A_Wandering_Soul__ Avatar

    Lol, I’m going to pretend I’m not sat here judging your previous ways of expressing an unusual sense of childhood innocence, however it made me laugh as I work nights as a HCA at an elderly care home, and part of my nightly duties are to work out exactly which seat covers need washing, (you can guess for what reasons), and it made me realise that I actually get paid in a sense to use this bloodhound nose of mine to determine exactly which seat has been sat on that day… Dear Lord above, this minimum pay we just about receive for the incomprehensible things we do weekly definitely isn’t sitting well with me lately…

    I can’t quite believe I just sat here and realised I’m a certifiably-paid seat-sniffer.

  8. see3milyplay Avatar

    Lmaooo, my best friend when we were kids used to smell such weird things like this. Smells never piqued my curiosity, but she shamelessly sniffed questionable things, also out of genuine curiosity. But this makes me wonder if she thinks about it now. Lol, looking back I felt kinda jealous she was so unabashed in her research!

  9. DustinDirt Avatar

    I know a kid that does this.

  10. Pfannkuchen-Nippel Avatar

    That’s crazy, my uncle, god rest his soul, my mom would tell me when he was a kid, he was a chronic seat sniffer also. Had to smell everyone’s seat whenever they got up. I never knew it was a thing with other people.

  11. OppositeAd3301 Avatar

    My friend did this up into he was in college.
    He was an absolute freak though into some really kinky things.
    Like abnormal kinky.
    Are you?

  12. Omshadiddle Avatar

    Chair sniffing as a kid – weird but harmless.

    Chair sniffing as an adult and elected official, not weird but harmless.

  13. Deluxe-T Avatar

    We call that pooning in my local area.

  14. Darkest_dark Avatar

    Did you grow up to become VP?

  15. Superb_Application83 Avatar

    Kids do weird shit 😂 I remember back in primary school (aged 6-8) I used to lick the palms of my hands because they were salty from sweat after playing out. Like seriously lick them all through class. Thinking back my teacher must’ve thought I was a little freak haha

  16. Jazzlike_Two204 Avatar

    Sis,is that you? My sister did this exact same thing when she was little

  17. sonicchilicheesdawg Avatar

    I seen this on an episode of my wife and kids 🤔

  18. TypicalLolcow Avatar

    Weird shit is common.

    I used to dry jump stuffed animals. First FWB, he used to ‘do it’ to the teenage girl fashion games. Nothing wrong with your proclivity especially as a kid. You were 9, give yourself grace , however I will still dunk on Adin Ross for sniffing a chair that Andrew Tate had sniffed down on prior.

  19. eten00 Avatar

    I to was a chair sniffer as a child

  20. takemeawayimdone2 Avatar

    There is an episode about this on a tv series called My wife and kids. Hilarious.

  21. chuckling-cheese Avatar

    You still would do it, you’ve just suppressed it.

  22. Salty-Neat448 Avatar

    i did as well tbh same age

  23. Free-Feeling3586 Avatar

    Better than being a ass sniffer🥴

  24. wookiesack22 Avatar

    Dog paws! Wtf. Are you a dog?

  25. Gallamos Avatar

    I remember the back on my cheap 2000s office chair smelled like bbq sauce. I would go around confirming others smelt like bbq too. Must have been the glue? From one chair sniffer to the next, they all smelled like bbq sauce.

  26. ClumpyCar210 Avatar

    Just finished up Sherlock Holmes. Most great detectives will use their nose to find clues where other would not dare to sniff or want to sniff. Hahaha. Its very valuable.

  27. Ok_Difference44 Avatar

    The Lives of Others (von Donnersmarck 2006) interrogation

  28. TOOTH_rot Avatar

    My friend’s little sister, Martha, used to do the exact same thing.

  29. Independent_Layer_62 Avatar

    I’d use a throwaway for this type confession. Sir/ma’am, I admire the enormous size of your balls

  30. Low-Sport2155 Avatar

    This sub has had some wild confessions but this is just flat out bizarre. Clearly you were negatively influenced by the family dog or someone else’s. This and being a child. No other explanation.

  31. Evening_One_5546 Avatar

    You just have a curious nose. You should get into perfumes, it might unlock something in you

  32. Lupinoid Avatar

    All my dogs feet have smelled like biscuits. Fluffy biscuit feet, tiny stubby biscuit feet. Little. Biscuit. Feets.

    *Biscuits as in the British meaning. Rich Tea or maybe a Malted Milk. Not the things Americans pour gravy over, which are clearly abused scones.

  33. Old-Law-7395 Avatar

    Your lucky you grew out of it

  34. AngledLuffa Avatar

    who left the best snail trails?