Personally when I’m anxious it fluctuates between two states. As you described speaking more maybe faster a false sense of confidence and a lack of focus on the situation. Or retreating into myself.
People can definitely pick up on that energy. Could be body movement or how you are presenting yourself during that time.
I withdraw. I’m selectively mute, so I absolutely have to get away to compose myself and figure out a solution to get around that anxiety. I think rarely people realize since some give me the space I need, but I don’t think they understand what I’m doing or what’s wrong with me.
I’ve had two women leave me because of it, and rightly so. My adoptive father was verbally (and rarely physically) abusive and would argue with my aunt (my adoptive mother) loudly and aggressively, which just left an imprint on me, I guess. Whenever a partner would become upset or start an argument, I’d shut down and sometimes panic internally, because I thought I fucked up badly and we would not be able to recover. I thought I would lose them. It’s VERY similar to talking underwater, internally, at least. I didn’t even know what was wrong with me at the time, but I did know why I couldn’t speak.
I’ve acknowledged that this is toxic behavior, both for me and any partners or people I interact with. It sucks, but at the end of the day, it is what it is, and that’s all you can say, because what can you do? 🙂
Crazy. I do this weird little game I call the In-n-out game where I’m anxious and I feel like I forget something so I panic and go from room to room about and ready to leave and because I’m anxious I forget something else and I have to come back and go back in the room again…
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Honestly I probably look like I’m in a rush or unfriendly lol either way I don’t really care
Personally when I’m anxious it fluctuates between two states. As you described speaking more maybe faster a false sense of confidence and a lack of focus on the situation. Or retreating into myself.
People can definitely pick up on that energy. Could be body movement or how you are presenting yourself during that time.
I withdraw. I’m selectively mute, so I absolutely have to get away to compose myself and figure out a solution to get around that anxiety. I think rarely people realize since some give me the space I need, but I don’t think they understand what I’m doing or what’s wrong with me.
I’ve had two women leave me because of it, and rightly so. My adoptive father was verbally (and rarely physically) abusive and would argue with my aunt (my adoptive mother) loudly and aggressively, which just left an imprint on me, I guess. Whenever a partner would become upset or start an argument, I’d shut down and sometimes panic internally, because I thought I fucked up badly and we would not be able to recover. I thought I would lose them. It’s VERY similar to talking underwater, internally, at least. I didn’t even know what was wrong with me at the time, but I did know why I couldn’t speak.
I’ve acknowledged that this is toxic behavior, both for me and any partners or people I interact with. It sucks, but at the end of the day, it is what it is, and that’s all you can say, because what can you do? 🙂
Crazy. I do this weird little game I call the In-n-out game where I’m anxious and I feel like I forget something so I panic and go from room to room about and ready to leave and because I’m anxious I forget something else and I have to come back and go back in the room again…
As anxious