My boy 25 m invited me to go to over to his parents house with him and his sister cause their parents are going out of town and they’re house sitting for them. Told him yeah if he wanted me to bring anything to drink or meat to grill. He said to just bring beer cause he has meat already and that he has a bottle so I took 28 pack of beer. Around 12 bro said he can’t hang anymore and was gonna gts. Told him that’s cool ima finish what’s left then ima gts. After he went to sleep I grabbed the lil cooler I took and sat down on the one single couch they have in their living room and started streaming the show “the office.” His sister (21) was still up and was drinking with me. Then we started watching the office and drinking. Then she asked about my ex cause I just broke up with her. Then asked what happened and after I told her she was saying “that’s fucked up” “she shouldn’t have done you like that”. Then she said “I wouldn’t do you like that” and then she asked me if I like her. Told her yeah you cool I fw her. But on some friends shit then she started telling me “she likes me and she never told me cause she was scared that I won’t feel the same”. She was saying she likes me cause I’m “respectful” and “nice with everyone don’t got no hate”. Then she asked me if I wanted to sleep with her in her bed and instead of the couch cause it’s “uncomfortable”. She said we can “have fun too” I told her “you’re really pretty and all but I can’t do my boy like that outta respect”. She apologized and she asked me not to tell him I told her okay I won’t. But I just feel like I need to tell him cause he’s like a brother to me. I wanna tell him cause I would wanna know if it was my sister. WIBTA if I told him?
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My boy 25 m invited me to go to over to his parents house with him and his sister cause their parents are going out of town and they’re house sitting for them. Told him yeah if he wanted me to bring anything to drink or meat to grill. He said to just bring beer cause he has meat already and that he has a bottle so I took 28 pack of beer. Around 12 bro said he can’t hang anymore and was gonna gts. Told him that’s cool ima finish what’s left then ima gts. After he went to sleep I grabbed the lil cooler I took and sat down on the one single couch they have in their living room and started streaming the show “the office.” His sister (21) was still up and was drinking with me. Then we started watching the office and drinking. Then she asked about my ex cause I just broke up with her. Then asked what happened and after I told her she was saying “that’s fucked up” “she shouldn’t have done you like that”. Then she said “I wouldn’t do you like that” and then she asked me if I like her. Told her yeah you cool I fw her. But on some friends shit then she started telling me “she likes me and she never told me cause she was scared that I won’t feel the same”. She was saying she likes me cause I’m “respectful” and “nice with everyone don’t got no hate”. Then she asked me if I wanted to sleep with her in her bed and instead of the couch cause it’s “uncomfortable”. She said we can “have fun too” I told her “you’re really pretty and all but I can’t do my boy like that outta respect”. She apologized and she asked me not to tell him I told her okay I won’t. But I just feel like I need to tell him cause he’s like a brother to me. I wanna tell him cause I would wanna know if it was my sister. WIBTA if I told him?
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> Telling my best friend that his sister tried to get with me. The action that will make me the asshole is telling my friend after I told his sister no.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
INFO: If you don’t tell him and he finds out later, is he gonna be pissed? The answer to this question will tell you whether or not to let him know.
yta gentlemen don’t tell
Ywbta if you told your friend as you promised you wouldn’t. It doesn’t really involve your friend sine it was a convoy between 2 adults.
You kind of painted yourself into a corner by assuring her you wouldn’t tell him. Nothing really happened so I wouldn’t worry about it too much.
I think you’d be TA in this situation. As a man with 4 sisters, it’s obvious when one of em has a crush on a friend. I’m sure he’s well aware, I’d just sweep it under the rug and act like it never happened. If the topic were to be brought up by him, that’d be a different situation, don’t lie to your bro but I also feel like you don’t need to rub it in his face that you could’ve banged his sister
Is she a minor?
She put you in a tough spot, that sucks my dude. But ultimately you can’t win this one 100%, you’re gonna betray one of them (your friend or his sister) no matter what you do or don’t do. So, you have to choose which one is more important to you, and act accordingly.
You want to cover the maximum possible number of bases (still not 100%, there’s no 100% win here)? You tell the sister you’re gonna tell him, and then you tell him before she does. You’re still “betraying” her in a way, but at least she gets a heads-up, which is the best she’s gonna get if that’s the choice you make. Good luck and NTA.
Info? Is she the type to get revenge by making up that you tried with her first? If so, tell him to protect yourself.
If not, is he going to care that she tried? If so, it depends on where your loyalty lies. Telling him will betray her. Not telling him will betray his trust.
If not, is there any other reason to tell him?
If you like her and think it could be worth pursuing, why not tell him that she showed interest in you and ask him what he thinks about it. If you have no interest in her, either leave it alone since you shut that down or just tell him his sister made a move. It doesn’t have to be a big deal.
YWBTA. Your friend doesn’t need to know about his sister’s likely humiliating pass — unless it happens again. If it does, don’t promise not to tell.
Promises should mean something, so learn how to not make them if you don’t intend to keep them. It’ll save you a lot of trouble down the road.
What his sister does is HER business, not his. She’s an adult and you said no, which is probably the best since it sounds like you were both drunk. Let sleeping dogs lie.
YWBTA if you told your friend. You promised not to tell. You and his sister are both consenting adults, so why do you feel the need to tell him she made a move on you? On the other hand, if you are truly interested in dating her, you could have a conversation with him about your interest just to give him a heads up.
Don’t.
You can be respectful to both here by just moving on. Forget it happened.
Unless he outright asks ywbta you promised her you wouldn’t.
Also personally I don’t see the issue if you actually got together with her
YWBTA yeah, your both adults and it’s really none of his business.
YWBTA she was drinking (as were you) and she asked you not to say anything, and she probably really regretted saying anything to you that night. If she tries again, maybe, but I’d just let this go.
YWBTA. Your respectful. Nothing happened. No harm no foul. She was nice about it. No need to tell the brother because it will get back to her and you don’t want to embarrass her.
YTA. Nothing to tell.
It’s not something you should tell your friend you already promised her and anyway it would cause some tension between them she was genuine about what she was feeling about you and it has nothing to with her big brother but if you think that you could genuinely see something long term with her then you should discuss it with her first and tell her you would discuss it with your friend and let her know
YTA. No need to tell him. It doesn’t affect him in any way at all. That he might want to know is irrelevant.
YWBTA Nothing happened. You both got drunk, she told you she liked you, you politely and respectfully turned her down, she seems OK with it. No need to tell her brother. That would just embarrass her. Now, if she gets weird after this, then you may explain to your bro. Or if you do decide to start dating her, then one of you (or both) ought to tell him.
I gotta say, you handled this very well, especially considering you were a little drunk. And she sees and likes your good character. I am quite impressed with both of you.
If you want to maintain your image DO NOT go back on your word to her. There is no good reason to tell your bro. Unless you want to start drama between him and his sister. Keep your word.
YWBTA – Her brother doesn’t own her, man, the frick? She’s her own woman. You don’t have to tell him her business. Y’all already handled it like adults, so why would you do a childish action like tell on her to her brother?
YWBTA. She hit on you, you rejected her. Just let her move on and forget what was probably embarassing enough. No need to drag him into this.
>she asked me not to tell him I told her okay I won’t.
You gave your word, and are now planning on breaking that word. if you did that, YWBTA.
>I would wanna know if it was my sister.
But…. why? What is the utility of knowing your sister tried to proposition your friend, and was shot down? What would this information add to your life? How would it help your relationship with your sister?
She put herself out there, you rebuffed her, and she seems to have taken it well. Let it be. Telling her brother will just stir up shit. Don’t be a shit stirrer.
Do you think women engaging with men devalues them or something? You talk like it’s a betrayal she doesn’t treat her brother like a patriarchal arbitrator of her life. Do you think sex devalues women? Like why would he care other than view women as property and dirty for doing something like this. It’s like you think having sex with a woman comes with disrespect. Why do you think it would be disrespectful to the men in her life to be with her unless you believe in the Madonna/whore complex (google it along with feminist interpretation). Meaning “good women” are chaste and bad women have sex but you also think having sex is their place… since you still do it with women even though it’s dirty of them. There’s no way this isn’t patriarchal
Ywbta
I would say u wouldn’t be the AH you were really respectful about the full thing I can’t imagine as I don’t have a sister but it seems u went about it tbe best way possible
Don’t say shit bruh. 1. It sounds to me like he invited you out there to set you two up, but maybe it’s just your wording. What I got from this is she might’ve went through her brother to get some alone time with you, and then when she was rejected she told her brother that she never made a move out of embarrassment. But that’s just me. My advice? If you like her in that way, talk to your boy about it but don’t bring up the convo. If you don’t, there’s no reason to say shit.
But you promised her that you wouldn’t tell her brother?… Aren’t you a man of your word?… What is the purpose him to know that his sister tried her shot, and got rejected?… what is the point?
Don’t tell him. Be a gentleman and keep quiet