Im supposed to have a baby shower in July and I live in a hot ass desert in California. I’ll be around 34 weeks pregnant. I’m not a people person and big events make me anxious. I’m also quite insecure in my body this being my first pregnancy. All these reasons make me not want to have a baby shower. I feel like I’m letting my people down but I know I should do what I want. Do you think I’d regret not having a baby shower?
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Backup of the post’s body: Im supposed to have a baby shower in July and I live in a hot ass desert in California. I’ll be around 34 weeks pregnant. I’m not a people person and big events make me anxious. I’m also quite insecure in my body this being my first pregnancy. All these reasons make me not want to have a baby shower. I feel like I’m letting my people down but I know I should do what I want. Do you think I’d regret not having a baby shower?
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Either you have a shower or buy everything yourself. That’s a you decision.
Baby showers aren’t really a thing here and I’m very antisocial so I wouldn’t have wanted one anyway so I don’t blame you there.
I doubt you’ll regret it if you’re not one for a fuss
However…do you need baby shit, cos people will buy you all kinds of stuff if you have one?
A baby shower is to meant to celebrate this new beginning. If having one doesn’t make you feel comfortable then don’t have one. it’s just like every other family/friends gathering but people bring gifts. Some of the gifts I got I never used anyways so don’t sweat it.
Do what makes you happy.
I feel like baby showers are a way to help get things and knowledge a baby needs but you can get your own things and ask for advice privately.
>Im supposed to have a baby shower
You’re not.
Just say you’re doing it the European style. Baby showers aren’t a thing here. Do whatever you want. If you don’t want one, don’t have one. That easy.
>I feel like I’m letting my people down
You’re not. No you will not regret it.
Yeah, I get the anxiety part, I hated being the center of attention and all of that! I worried about looking and feeling hugely uncomfortable and the comments from relatives about my size because I was tiny before pregnancy and didn’t like any part of being g pregnant. However, people enjoy giving gifts and it’s stuff you need and stuff you didn’t know you needed. Try to tough it out for a few hours. Put on an Oscar winning performance then collapse and pat yourself on the back for getting through it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not JUST for the stuff, it’s for the sense of community and getting people together. You get ready and eat before anyone arrives. You can say no to games. One option is to greet people and open their gift as they arrive and give a heartfelt thanks without everyone’s eyes on you before sending them off to find food. The guests would appreciate not having to sit through gift opening, lol. OR, you can tell guests the attention makes you nervous and speedily go through the gifts! If there is a special gift like a quilt or family heirloom, have a family member set a time to unveil just that gift. Then place gifts on a table for all to see as they wander and visit. There are great ways to do this without you having to worry about anything other than showing up and acting. So, will you regret NOT having one? You can’t really regret something that you didn’t have… Will you regret HAVING a shower? I’m pretty sure you’ll be glad you did.
I refused a baby shower for either of my pregnancies for the same reason. My mom was upset at first but she got over it. They’re now 7 and 9 absolutely zero regrets. It just doesn’t matter in the scheme of things. Don’t suffer through an event you don’t want for the sake of others, it’s YOUR baby. Your needs come first here. Put your foot down now before people start feeling entitled to other things like being present in the delivery room.
No, I never do them. It’s a personal thing. People still got me gifts anyway, without the social pressure aspects of throwing a baby shower. That’s how i feel about them.