Women of reddit that are waiting/waited for marriage for sex, is/was it important that your SO is/was a virgin as well, or the opposite and why?
Women of reddit that are waiting/waited for marriage for sex, is/was it important that your SO is/was a virgin as well, or the opposite and why?
r/AskWomen
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Just a little bit, so I don’t feel uncomfortable about not being knowledgeable enough. Like I would want to figure this out together. But not super hell bent on it, if he has more experience,AND he is not bragging about it then Perf.
Hello. My husband and I agreed to wait until after marriage to have sex. I myself was not a Virgin.
I told my husband that I always assumed the right guy wouldn’t NEED me to leverage sex in order for marriage, but I was very tired of having sex with people that AREN’T my husband, and not having sex until after marriage ensures that. I told him if he was my husband he wouldn’t mind waiting.
And he didnt mind waiting.
His body count did not matter to me.
I was a virgin, my husband was not and I didn’t care, as long as I’m the only one after the wedding lol.
I personally couldn’t care less. Of course, it wouldn’t make me happy if they had a lot of partners, but it wouldn’t matter too much.
We all have our own life experience and as long as we are aligned on what our values are the moment we get together and as long as any pain or hurt is “looked into” and healed, the rest is irrelevant.
you need to get more into the why’s though. I was raised in a fundamentalist Christian sect that focused so much on virginity for both. well we were, and we were absolutely traumatized by how little we knew.
(Growing up in a religious household) no, absolutely not. At the end of the day it was my decision and as long as my husband was clean (that he has no ongoing STD’s and if he did then we would have had to talk about it more). But no issue if he had intimate relations before- every can choose their own path
I was a virgin and it honestly did matter to me. Not so much that if he was a virgin, but more so that he would’ve only had about 1 or 2 before me – but only because we were so young and I wanted to be with someone that had the same ideas around sex and the deep meaning behind it. I believe sex should be with someone you’re seriously committed to, in a healthy way, between adults, and in love. I also believe sex can be fun, carnal, playful, etc – but that is included in the first “qualifications” so to speak. Someone who viewed sex as casual, willing and ready to have sex with any women also willing, one night stands, etc- just wouldn’t have been compatible with me. We both had had sexual experiences with other people, but never full on PIV until we were married.
I’m glad we were able to learn and grow and experiment together