Locker talk, particularly about women, would drive me crazy. I was the only woman in class for two Associate’s Degrees and oh Lord, the kind of crap I heard… big oof.
The social expectation of knowing about football (or sport in general) and affiliating with a team. As a woman I can say ‘I don’t know, I don’t watch sport’ and it is begrudgingly accepted with no further questions.
Not being able to go to playgrounds. They’re fun even though I’m a bit old for them, and the worst I get is the occasional weird look. If I were a man people would probably think I was a creep.
People assuming you’re a child predator just because you’re nice to a kid.
My good friend would be an incredible early education teacher but he’s been told by people in the know who hire teachers that he’ll never get hired because the stigma against male early education teachers is real.
Being expected (by most of society) to show no real emotion or be vulnerable, ever. Wtf is that!? As if men aren’t human beings. It makes no sense to me and women who say they lose respect for their man when he is vulnerable or shows emotion are absolute garbage. Nobody is strong 100% of the time & everyone deserves a safe space to process the shit life throws our way.
A woman expecting me to be the sole provider for her and a family. The idea of being financially responsible for multiple people on one income is a literal nightmare.
Men are often judged by their financial success or professional status. From early boyhood, they’re taught that their value lies in their ability to earn, provide, and lead.
It’s a tremendous amount of pressure that must be soul crushing in many ways.
I saw a picture of a guy that got his nuts stuck in the grooves on a patio chair…having your reproductive organs on the outside doesn’t sound like such a good idea anymore.
There seems to be a lot of pressure to make a good living and prove you make a good living. How big is your house? How nice is your car? Are you “manly enough” to make enough money to attract a hot woman, which you do through showing her how much money you make? First off, I think it’s silly anyway bc a “good man” to me has little to do with his income level. But it is a thing and many women agree and demand a man who has a high salary and will treat her to things. But to think my worth is in what I buy sounds exhausting. And the threat of your woman leaving if you lose that income too bc that’s your worth…
I think that it sucks how many men don’t have relationships in their life where they don’t directly, in an overt way, benefit from it. It’s romantic relationships. Familial relationships. And work relationships. It doesn’t seem often that men just have friends. And it seems like even when they do, it has to be a proactive friendship where they have to be doing something like gaming or something..like they can’t just talk and enjoy each other’s. Company.
I’ve noticed through talking to my bf and male friends, people can generally be less friendly towards you. Most of the time you generally get decent treatment from people as a woman (aside from the creeps) but I think sometimes as a man people are more apathetic. It makes me sad to think about.
Interestingly, not one woman who has answered has mentioned how much it sucks dating as a man.
Don’t get me wrong, dating sucks as a woman, but if you ask men I guarantee the number one answer about what sucks being a man is trying to get romantic connection. You’re always being tested, always being found wanting, you’re dismissed or ignored for shallow reasons, and then gaslit that you can’t possibly be rejected for shallow reasons. (e.g. height, like it’s always treated as though it is his attitude if a guy is short but then nearly every woman says, “he has to be taller than me” – which is a fair requirement, but you can’t have it both ways where it is an acceptable common deal breaker but every man who says it has been debilitating in dating must be lying.)
I get that it’s likely hard since women have the opposite problem and (most) men don’t particularly understand how exhausting being objectified all the time is, but there was that woman who tried living and dating as a man, and it had her suicidal. Nobody is entitled to anyone else’s attention, but being alone for long stretches and constantly rejected is extremely taxing on your psyche. Especially when the same people who will tell you men need to be more vulnerable and honest about their emotions get downright furious if he expresses his anger, disappointment, and depression over it.
The stigma men and boys who experience sexual assault still go through. It is improving somehwat, I guess, but still pretty shit situation.
Women and girls experience a different kind of stigma but often can get empathy from other women with shared experiences whereas it doesnt seem like it is the same for men who don’t get as much support from other men.
I feel bad every time I run into a man while opening a door and getting jumpy because I didn’t know he was there. They always apologize but I get startled very easily. It’s not them, it’s me.
The lack of community. I’m a very expressive person and I cry during every sad movie. I couldn’t handle it being socially acceptable to only express anger, happiness, or nonchalance.
That you could ne labeled a creep or publicly accused of being a pdf, or you say no to a young girl and she might called you a rapist abd you reputation is just down the drain.
The pressure to be “in command”, and to be the ultimately financially responsible person for a family. I know things are changing, mores and norms are changing, attitudes are adjusting, women are working outside the home, and so on. But the backlash is considerable, such as “trad wives”, internet posts where young women strive to look sexy to attract…..affection? Positive feedback? from men, and the incel movement. But until we all make a major social shift to where we are comfortable with men and women being equal partners in relationships, and explore this whole new world of expectations, it’s going to be a contentious struggle.
Toxic masculinity. Being told that no matter how you feel, you will never measure up to some externally and eternally changing metric. You will always be a victim because it’s always everyone else’s fault. Never being permitted to actually partner with someone because it goes against this ethos.
Unfuck Tate and his fellow trolls. Toxic masculinity has existed forever but those fuckers have made bank destroying men with self esteem issues.
Comments
the extra piss that drips out of your dick and gets in your underwear
[deleted]
Peeing when you wake up seems like it would be annoying with morning wood.
Inadvertently being in competition with other men simply by existing as a man. Sounds exhausting.
Locker talk, particularly about women, would drive me crazy. I was the only woman in class for two Associate’s Degrees and oh Lord, the kind of crap I heard… big oof.
The social expectation of knowing about football (or sport in general) and affiliating with a team. As a woman I can say ‘I don’t know, I don’t watch sport’ and it is begrudgingly accepted with no further questions.
Not being able to go to playgrounds. They’re fun even though I’m a bit old for them, and the worst I get is the occasional weird look. If I were a man people would probably think I was a creep.
I don’t think I’d be thrilled if I had to deal with making a mess every single time I wanted to have an orgasm.
The “being socially conditioned into emotional restraint” phenomenon.
It seems suffocating and it is unhealthy. It would also make longterm relationships harder.
I want to be able to express my feelings, and not have implications that I’m less of a man for it.
People assuming you’re a child predator just because you’re nice to a kid.
My good friend would be an incredible early education teacher but he’s been told by people in the know who hire teachers that he’ll never get hired because the stigma against male early education teachers is real.
The involuntary genital mutilation days after my birth because my Dad doesn’t want “other kids to laugh at my penis.”
The lack of support or closeness in friendships
The fact that society portrays having emotions as a man as a weakness.
How lonely they seem to be. Relationships/friendships seem so hard for men.
Being expected (by most of society) to show no real emotion or be vulnerable, ever. Wtf is that!? As if men aren’t human beings. It makes no sense to me and women who say they lose respect for their man when he is vulnerable or shows emotion are absolute garbage. Nobody is strong 100% of the time & everyone deserves a safe space to process the shit life throws our way.
sitting on my manly equipage.
Having to pretend the insects I’ve been tasked with killing don’t creep me out, too.
Involuntary erections.
Knowing that it is assumed that I am a predator of some kind.
That so mad I cry from anger not sadness, but as a man. That would suck.
Being high fived as a sexual abuse victim instead of treated as such.
The dedication it takes to be jacked.
If I were a straight dude– saying no to head from eager gays. It must be sooo good, right?
Managing my search histories.
Toxic masculinity sucks for men too. Just saw a commercial claiming you aren’t a real man if you have soft hands 🙄
Anger
Unable to approach people for help in public because they’ll think I’m a creep
Having to be the one who automatically is assigned the annoying outside tasks when it’s winter (like restocking fireplace wood)
A woman expecting me to be the sole provider for her and a family. The idea of being financially responsible for multiple people on one income is a literal nightmare.
Gang/prison culture. The violence is so scary
Men are often judged by their financial success or professional status. From early boyhood, they’re taught that their value lies in their ability to earn, provide, and lead.
It’s a tremendous amount of pressure that must be soul crushing in many ways.
The expectation of hypersexuality
Other men
I saw a picture of a guy that got his nuts stuck in the grooves on a patio chair…having your reproductive organs on the outside doesn’t sound like such a good idea anymore.
Loneliness, then being told you’re the most privileged group so suck it up.
Testicles sticking to inner thighs and generally just having everything just swinging around all the time.
There seems to be a lot of pressure to make a good living and prove you make a good living. How big is your house? How nice is your car? Are you “manly enough” to make enough money to attract a hot woman, which you do through showing her how much money you make? First off, I think it’s silly anyway bc a “good man” to me has little to do with his income level. But it is a thing and many women agree and demand a man who has a high salary and will treat her to things. But to think my worth is in what I buy sounds exhausting. And the threat of your woman leaving if you lose that income too bc that’s your worth…
The worst things about being a man if I were one:
Getting bold? Or having erectile disfunction?
I think that it sucks how many men don’t have relationships in their life where they don’t directly, in an overt way, benefit from it. It’s romantic relationships. Familial relationships. And work relationships. It doesn’t seem often that men just have friends. And it seems like even when they do, it has to be a proactive friendship where they have to be doing something like gaming or something..like they can’t just talk and enjoy each other’s. Company.
I’ve noticed through talking to my bf and male friends, people can generally be less friendly towards you. Most of the time you generally get decent treatment from people as a woman (aside from the creeps) but I think sometimes as a man people are more apathetic. It makes me sad to think about.
Being judge against a whole gender for things that I would do as a man or won’t do.
Wow. I’m actually surprised at the incredible accuracy of the comments here!
Shaving every day.
Interestingly, not one woman who has answered has mentioned how much it sucks dating as a man.
Don’t get me wrong, dating sucks as a woman, but if you ask men I guarantee the number one answer about what sucks being a man is trying to get romantic connection. You’re always being tested, always being found wanting, you’re dismissed or ignored for shallow reasons, and then gaslit that you can’t possibly be rejected for shallow reasons. (e.g. height, like it’s always treated as though it is his attitude if a guy is short but then nearly every woman says, “he has to be taller than me” – which is a fair requirement, but you can’t have it both ways where it is an acceptable common deal breaker but every man who says it has been debilitating in dating must be lying.)
I get that it’s likely hard since women have the opposite problem and (most) men don’t particularly understand how exhausting being objectified all the time is, but there was that woman who tried living and dating as a man, and it had her suicidal. Nobody is entitled to anyone else’s attention, but being alone for long stretches and constantly rejected is extremely taxing on your psyche. Especially when the same people who will tell you men need to be more vulnerable and honest about their emotions get downright furious if he expresses his anger, disappointment, and depression over it.
Smelling bad and being ugly
Having to be the person in my relationship that handles bugs 🥲
Not being able to hug my friends, be emotional or wear whatever clothes i want without being called a slur.
The stereotype and and society. How society thinks men should be and the expectations they are held to
Being looked down on for showing emotions or caring about your mental health or doing anything that most people consider “masculine.”
The stigma men and boys who experience sexual assault still go through. It is improving somehwat, I guess, but still pretty shit situation.
Women and girls experience a different kind of stigma but often can get empathy from other women with shared experiences whereas it doesnt seem like it is the same for men who don’t get as much support from other men.
Lack of attention, physical touch etc It seems a very closed off world and I would hate it.
I feel bad every time I run into a man while opening a door and getting jumpy because I didn’t know he was there. They always apologize but I get startled very easily. It’s not them, it’s me.
Having a penis sounds really inconvenient the vast majority of the time.
Random boners.
As a woman, nobody knows I’m honry 24/7 369
The lack of community. I’m a very expressive person and I cry during every sad movie. I couldn’t handle it being socially acceptable to only express anger, happiness, or nonchalance.
I don’t think i would like having a penis. The way it just hangs off you. No thanks.
The concept of urinals always horrified me
Men (almost all) don’t have the option to not earn, which can be pretty mentally taxing to think about as a young adult
Not having friends I could be openly emotionally vulnerable with and supported by.
That you could ne labeled a creep or publicly accused of being a pdf, or you say no to a young girl and she might called you a rapist abd you reputation is just down the drain.
being judged for showing emotion, and enjoying more docile things
Every man I’ve been with is always adjusting their balls. So I guess that?
The pressure to be “in command”, and to be the ultimately financially responsible person for a family. I know things are changing, mores and norms are changing, attitudes are adjusting, women are working outside the home, and so on. But the backlash is considerable, such as “trad wives”, internet posts where young women strive to look sexy to attract…..affection? Positive feedback? from men, and the incel movement. But until we all make a major social shift to where we are comfortable with men and women being equal partners in relationships, and explore this whole new world of expectations, it’s going to be a contentious struggle.
“If I wanted to mow the lawn and shovel the driveway, I’d have had four girls.” — My mother, who had four boys instead
boners, i would have one 24/7 😭
Toxic masculinity. Being told that no matter how you feel, you will never measure up to some externally and eternally changing metric. You will always be a victim because it’s always everyone else’s fault. Never being permitted to actually partner with someone because it goes against this ethos.
Unfuck Tate and his fellow trolls. Toxic masculinity has existed forever but those fuckers have made bank destroying men with self esteem issues.
Having a small cock
Women would assume that I’m a predator.