Work an agonizing 9 to 5, five days a week… Or humiliate yourself every Tuesday for a fat wad of cash?

r/

You could work a soul-crushing 9-to-5, five days a week, earning $10 an hour and barely making $1,600 a month—before taxes.

Or, you could make $1,500 every Tuesday by following one simple rule: tell 20 strangers you shit your pants this morning. The barista? Confess. The sweet old lady with groceries? Spill it. The hot guy or girl on the park bench? Own it. No excuses. You gotta look them in the eye, say ‘’I shit myself this morning’’, and keep it moving.

Do this 20 times, and you pocket $1,500. No taxes. That’s $6,000 a month versus $1,600 from the grind.

So, are you gonna take the deal, or keep your dignity and your 9 to 5?

Comments

  1. AutoModerator Avatar

    Copy of the original post in case of edits: You could work a soul-crushing 9-to-5, five days a week, earning $10 an hour and barely making $1,600 a month—before taxes.

    Or, you could make $1,500 every Tuesday by following one simple rule: tell 20 strangers you shit your pants this morning. The barista? Confess. The sweet old lady with groceries? Spill it. The hot guy or girl on the park bench? Own it. No excuses. You gotta look them in the eye, say ‘’I shit myself this morning’’, and keep it moving.

    Do this 20 times, and you pocket $1,500. No taxes. That’s $6,000 a month versus $1,600 from the grind.

    So, are you gonna take the deal, or keep your dignity and your 9 to 5?

    I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

  2. Old_Reflection5360 Avatar

    Id do it while wearing a shirt that says: “I get paid to pretend I shit myself.”

  3. Captonayan Avatar

    I take the bus, say it out loud. The average bus packs easily 50–60 people here, so I just yell it once, then done, I earned a 1.5x my monthly income in 2 minutes.

  4. monkeysky Avatar

    How is “humiliate” defined?

    It would have to be very lenient, because embarrassing myself to an exceptional degree an average of four times per weekday seems pretty agonizing already, even for $64k a year.

    On the other hand, working full time for less than $20k would just make it impossible to survive in a lot of the US, so it would require at least moving to somewhere with a very low cost of living.

  5. Brute_Squad_44 Avatar

    I’ll volunteer at dementia wards.

  6. ConstantMan1a Avatar

    2nd. i already have no dignity left so i’lo just go for it lol. besides its fun and maybe they’ll laugh so i dont mind too much 🙂

  7. Sad-Committee-4902 Avatar

    Meh. Become a stand up comic.

    Now its your opening line.
    “I shit my pants this morning, and it was everything I hoped it could be.”
    “Taco Bell, ammirite?”
    “My wife wouldn’t even be in the same room with me. I shouldve done this a long time ago”
    “Do i wear adult diapers? …Depends.”

  8. mraot07 Avatar

    Easy. Tuesday! Just go to a busy plaza, gather 20 people, yell “I shit myself this morning. “ then leave. Thanks for the easy money.

  9. dumptruckbhadie Avatar

    Yo, I would stand on the street corner shitting my pants while holding a sign that says, “I SHIT MY PANTS!”

  10. Puzzled_Newspaper_24 Avatar

    I pick humiliation Tuesday

  11. tea-123 Avatar

    I’d travel out of the city every Tuesday with a package of adult diapers in one of those clear reusable tote bags. If I catch folks staring I’d say the line .

  12. Sidewalk_Tomato Avatar

    >So, are you gonna take the deal, or keep your dignity and your 9 to 5?

    What makes you think my 9 to 5 was dignified? (Also: it was 8 to 5).

    I hated it. I left.

    Claiming I shat my pants to 20 people every Tuesday would be much easier.