Here’s how the story goes.
On Monday morning, as I walked into the ladies’ changing room at work (note: I’m the only woman there, so I knew it was directed at me), I discovered that someone had taken the time to come in and leave sweet little notes all over the room. They were written on Post-its and said things like: “You have beautiful eyes,” “My heart beats fast when you look at me,” “I love your smile,” and so on.
I knew exactly who it was, because this person has a strong accent and it clearly showed through his writing.
Needless to say, I’m a 35-year-old woman, and no man has ever done something so sweet for me before. But I’m in a relationship—and I made that clear when I replied, leaving a note as well, since I’m very shy.
He then wrote me a long letter, saying he was sorry if he had offended me. He explained that he’s been in a relationship for 16 years, but he can’t stop thinking about me and wants to get to know me better.
Of course, the answer is no. I’m already with someone—he’s far from perfect, but our relationship works.
The thing is… I can’t stop thinking about all this. And I feel terrible about it.
Comments
As nice as it is it’s workplace sexual harassment. Against HR laws. He could be fired for it. So if you want it to stop tell him that.
It sounds like he is bored in his relationship and wants to explore other options. I would take the compliments and walk away. Maybe you can bring up the notes to your man? Maybe say it happened to someone else and tell him how you would feel if he did something like that for you?
It is a sweet gesture—or is it? I think you might need to ask yourself why a man who is currently in a 16-year relationship would love bomb a woman in this manner, a woman who might not have been interested and/or available, in a way that required him to enter a woman’s changing room AT WORK, which is surely a HR issue.
It’s natural to feel flattered by the attention but there were so many less creepy ways he could have gone about finding out if you were interested and/or available. Plus he is not, which means he has no right to even approach you in any way.
This would be romance novel levels of sweetness if it was directed to his partner of 16 years, the story made me sad tbh
girl 😭😭😭 u think the man in a relationship for 16 years hasn’t been doing this with the girl he’s in that 16 year long relationship with? wake up my sister 😫🙏
Don’t fall for a cheating simp, it’s literally one of the easiest things not to do.
Affairs don’t start in the bedroom.
Although flattering, also grossly inappropriate. If he would cheat on a woman that has dedicated 16 years of her life to him, what would he do to someone new.
You haven’t done anything wrong yet. I would report him to HR and move on. Sometimes people like him target the shy sweet girls because they are confident you wont tell, and you absolutely should tell.
you guys are focused on the wrong thing if you’re stuck thinking about what’s wrong with your relationship that a man leaving post it notes is the sweetest thing someone has done for you might be time to reevaluate your relationships period
So inappropriate and creepy!
The man is in a 16 year relationship and sniffing around you. If you were to get with him, he’d start sniffing at another woman pretty quick.
Not entirely sure what you do for work that requires a changing room, but if you’re the only woman there using it..it’s extremely inappropriate he entered that space, and this needs to be brought up to HR immediately. Even though you’re not offended, that’s aggressive behavior by him and doesn’t belong in a workspace.
No offence but if you think youre the first or only woman he’s ever done this to, think again. This isn’t sweet, this is gross and he’s just fishing who will bite.
Is anybody else curious how you recognize an accent through written words??
The grass always looks greener on the other side until you figure out it is fertilized with B.S.
He is married. That makes him off limits. Period.
If you are happy, then forget about this, “sweet gesture”. If it, “just works for you”, maybe you need to think something things through. But DO NOT in any circumstance follow through on anything with this guy. You want to be the cause for causing someone else that much pain?
If HE is unhappy, he needs to address that without involving you.
I’m a dude and that would creep me out…
Gross.