hello, when I was 17 l was in an online relationship with a 15 year old. Once I realized that romantic/ sexual relationships were illegal/ inappropriate for our ages, I told her we should just be friends. (17 is the age of consent here.) we live in Illinois.
I turned 18 5 days ago, she turns 16 in 2 months. There’s a 2 year and 2 month age gap.
So now, we are close friends. We still talk daily, spend time together by playing games/ facetiming, stuff like that. it kinda feels romantic? Even though we don’t flirt or anything, we are emotionally close and I know she still likes me. It just feels like we are more than friends and it makes me feel like I’m manipulating her feelings. Like I’m shaping her into what I want her to be or something
I haven’t made any promises about the future or hints about dating, but seeing how we dated in the past, it might be giving her hope.
I’m worried that this could be grooming? She’s still underage and will be for another year. I say we are” friends” but we feel like more than that. I’m worried this is creating expectations, that by staying emotionally close l’m inappropriately influencing her feelings, so that she’ll want to be in a romantic relationship when we are older.
I think we both would like to revisit a romantic relationship when she’s older, which makes me feel like a groomer. It just feels like she might be
“waiting it out” until we can date
I also feel she’s emotionally dependent on me, always telling me how I’m her best friend. This whole situation is stressing me out so bad, I don’t want to hurt her in any way. This situation seems unfair to her