By “meet,” I mean a situation where it is typical to exchange names, or when someone introduces you.
Example: Your brother says: “This is my friend, Bob.”
You: Shakes hands “Nice to meet you Bob. Will you marry me?”
Yeah 😂
You cannot explain it in any way other than a desire to marry the person.
You only get ten free passes in your life to NOT do it before you lose the pension, and if they say yes and are serious, you give up $1000 per month of the pension to get out of it.
Do you accept the deal?
Only exception, you dont have to say it if the person is under 18, or if you can’t be sure of it.
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Copy of the original post in case of edits: By “meet,” I mean a situation where it is typical to exchange names, or when someone introduced you.
Example: Your brother says: “This is my friend, Bob.”
You: Shakes hands “Nice to meet you, Bob. Will you marry me?”
Yeah 😂
You cannot explain it in any way other than a desire to marry the person.
You only get ten free passes in your life to NOT do it before you lose the pension, and if they say yes and are serious, you give up $1000 per month of the pension to get out of it.
Do you accept the deal?
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No one takes me seriously anyways so why not?
Well I’ll certainly accept it but I’ll probably use my passes on the first 10 people I meet. I should at least get half a year out of it still.
I’m already married, so they can try to marry me, but I won’t be getting divorced. I’ll also tell them I’m already married. My current partner would be in on it.
Yes, I would just laugh nerviosly every time hinting that is a joke without actually explaining it
Does this include children?
If they accept, do I have to go through with it?
Yep, I take it, and I grin, wink, and laugh when I say it. 🙂
Without hesitation. Very few of these situations happen. Especially since I won’t have to work for a living again. Can’t actually remember the last time it happened outside of work. And when it does happen I’m ok with people thinking I’m weird. 😆
Easy money, I’ve already met enough people in my life.
No. I’m already married. Even if I weren’t, 5k/Mo is no where near enough. If there is an “enough,” which there probably isn’t.
Collect money and avoid social interaction. I’m in.
> you dont have to say it if the person is under 18, or if you can’t be sure of it
Can one really ever be sure?
“You wanna get married? Na, totally joking. I have to say it, it’s in my contract.”
Nope. Not a chance. I meet new people at work at least once a week. I’d get fired so fast.
Absolutely. I say off the wall stuff like that already.
Easy yes.
Bob will be stunned
“That was an awesome ice breaker yea?”
Done
Fuck yeah.
Fuck yeah.
Fuck yeah.
Deal, I’ve already done that multiple times. Easy.
Deal, I’ve already done that multiple times. Easy.
Question does it have to be this blunt and upfront or at any time during the initial talk?
Because you while you can’t directly explain the demand as anything but genuine, you could easy imply it’s a joke, like “oh my god you made that dish? Please marry me!”
5,000 a month is only 60,000 a year, which imo isn’t all that much money for the related hassel. Anyone with any kind of a public facing job with the bare minimum of professionalism will lose their job or get fired within a month. Only if they have kind of job/social life that doesn’t require them to meet or interact with people could this be worth it.
I would legally change my name to William Umarime. Will for short.
I feel like with enthusiasm and a compliment on the end you can get away with it. I.e. “hi I’m bob, will you marry me? Those boots! You know my heart.”
60k a year tax free and I don’t have to leave the house? Any time I am obligated to do so it turns into a joke because I just asked 10-15 people at the function to marry me? Shiiiiiit. Sure. For the record, the only time I genuinely meet new people is work-related, and I make less than 60k unless my year involves a lot of OT. I’d rather take it easy.
So I would be Ted Mosby from How I met your mother? Sure
Hell yeah. It’ll replace my current greeting of “wanna fuck?”
Hmm I’m sure it would be quite awkward at first but wouldn’t be so bad over time.
Fun part is, I usually don’t even care to learn the names of people I say hi to. Maybe their dogs. I think quite a few of my neighbors don’t even know my name but we chat often enough that we should… like I know bdays and ages of one neighbor and their dogs’ names but not the names of the actual people that live there…
What about group settings? Where you might have to introduce yourself to a group or like be introduced to a group of people all at once?
And if I have it on my shirt or like a pin, wouldn’t that count? What if I ask in another language just to throw people off?
Gotta find ways to have fun with it and still get paid!
Hey that’s like the time I was an exchange student and they taught me that “will you may be” meant “nice to meet you”… What exactly is the downside to this again?
Yes, and if it adjusts according to inflation then Hell yeah !
As Maebe Funke would say, MARRY ME!
You underestimate my ability to mutter.
I’ll say “marry me” with all the sincerity I can muster while keeping it muddled, and most people won’t be able to tell it from a moan. If someone does catch on and asks what it was, I’ll tell them I want to marry them in the most sarcastic tone possible. No new person I meet will buy it.
I’ll say in Japanese “kekkon?” And when they ask me to repeat it I’m going with “hey yo” or “let’s go” or “sorry I saw a gecko”
Every single person means every shop assistant or barista etc.
You will get people say Yes sooner or later so that $5000 becomes $0 after not very long.
At which point do you still have to ask people to marry you but for nothing?
I’d do it
Will you marry me? No? Here’s 100$ i get paid to ask that question.
Sure, just learn to say it in another language, polish has a a pretty short phrase for “will you marry me” and isn’t a particularly common language. Also 60k is enough to go full NEET hermit if you’re really uncomfortable.
No because I’m about to PCS for the first time as a Marine and that would be real fuckin awkward meeting my new chain of command and going “Good morning sir, will you marry me?”
Didn’t say you had to get married, only to ask. Also, I don’t meet new people enough for there to be any downside to this
An extra 60k a year in exchange for being a little awkward and cringy is worth it. I can learn a different language and say it in Japanese or something and they’d never know lol
Deal. You never said anything about asking in the language they know. I’ll just ask in a language they (hopefully) don’t know.
Oh cool, I don’t meet people anyways so free $5000 is a no brainer
Easy money.
Does the phrase have to be in your native language?
For example, Hi <Name> nice to meet you, I’m Dave, ibi nyoma.
People might think it’s a quirky little phrase, like ‘it means no worries’ rather than an expression of romantic interest.
Didn’t say they have to hear it properly, I say it super quietly and if they ask what I said I’ll just say I was repeating their name as I’m super bad at remembering them (also true)
Sure, I don’t mind getting married.
Sure, I’ll just ask them in a foreign language. Maybe Latin, you can say any absurd nonsense in Latin and it sounds nice.
Of course! I dont meet new people that often, and if all my free passes are used within a year, that’s still a free $60000
Easy, so easy.
Im already married so is that my get out? I can’t marry two people… If so, sure! Never have to work again (still would though).
Just explain it as a tic.
Sure. If they say “yes”, I’ll click my fingers in a dagnabbit way and say “shoot, forgot I’m already married”.
Yeah I haven’t met (exchanged names) with anyone new in years except for starting a new job this year, which I wouldn’t have needed to do if I had 5k a month guaranteed
Couldn’t you just cash out some money and receive no consequences? Like once you use the 10 free “no”s, you have five more “no”s until you have no extra income.
I would accept the deal. And probably quit my job. I work with a lot of different companies so I meet a lot of people on the job. I would spend a month or two just hanging at home, instacarting groceries and pursuing my hobbies and passions. Start selling artwork online, and create other income streams that require little human interaction.
Once I’m stir crazy I’ll start branching out more. It’s surprising easy to go weeks without having to introduce yourself to people when you’re all alone. I would avoid places where introductions are the norm, like restaurants and bars. Maybe I would just be a dick and never really talk to people to I could keep the income stream. Just solo vacations with minimal human contact.
Regardless of how long I try to stretch it, introductions will be made. I’ll use the 10 freebies and then say “no” another 5 times. At that point I’ll have no magic income stream, but I did have a very nice vacation from working with little to no consequences. Even if I’m still magically obligated to propose to everyone, it’s pretty easy to play that off as a joke. “Oh yeah I ask everyone to marry me when I meet them, it’s my thing”.
Yeah, give it a few months, and it’ll turn into an inside joke—something that’s just my thing. So, when my friend Bob wants to introduce me to Max, he’ll be like, ‘Hey, Dependent-Plan-5998 is on his way. He’s a great guy. Oh, and just so you know, he always asks people he meets to marry him. Don’t take it seriously.’ I can totally live with that.
Getting a new job would be hard but why would I work?
I meet so many people everyday I don’t know how I’d make this not super weird
Will you marry me?
Great now that I’ve got
Your attention my
Name is ….
5,000 so easy.
Easily yes. Also a easy get out, close your eye when meeting someone new then you can’t be sure they are not 18 so don’t have to say it. After a few seconds you can open your eyes as you’ve already met.
“Marry me” -Maybe
I had two coworkers propose to me at my old job. There’s ways to do it casually apparently😂 i doubt anyone would think you’re serious
Sign me up, I’m here for this chaos. Either people will assume I’m weird (duh), or eventually people I know will stop introducing me to new people.
It’s a win/win.
Absolutely!
I would carry a stack of cards that explains I have tourettes
Oh this is easy to make into a joke. Then eventually a beautiful woman says yes, we move into a house with a white picket fence and live happily ever after.
No, I bartend so I meet a fuckton of people. It would get tiring saying that 50x a night.
Yeah it’d just become my quirky tagline, “oh Greg you didn’t tell me about this absolute unit of a dude! what a sharp dresser. You know we can get married legally over here now ever thought about it?
you didnt say i cant say it in an extremely sarcastic tone or still ask it but in a way thats clearly not meant to be a real question 🙂
All people that I meet that are new? No way, that’s not enough money to make yourself a pariah everywhere that you go.
How could someone get and keep a job like that?
Just say it in a dumb voice pulling a face – no one will take you seriously.
If by some strange circumstance some says yes, set the wedding date for 2099.
I don’t talk to people and 5k is enough to live on, no real downside for me! Living that loner life
Sure. I don’t even exchange names with new coworkers so it may never come up, lol.
Deal. “Sorry, I have turretts”
As long as i can something a little bit longer before it will be zero problem
“Hi Bob Fuck, nice to, i have Tourette Syndrome, meet, will you marry me ? shit damn”
There is some danger here in Thailand as quite a lot of women might take that seriously.
You could spin it off as part of a goofy personality if you’re good enough
I take it and change my last name.
“Nice to meet you, I’m Wendy Willieuxmareemee”
This is a pretty easy one if you’re already married.
Easy, then I’d hand them a crisp $20 bill and ask them not to ask
As long as your clearly unserious there’s no downsides
I’m already married lol. The logistics wouldn’t work.
I am a woman, and chronically ill. I already struggle enough with being taken seriously by health care professionals.
On the other hand, 5000 pr month? I could afford to go private for most of my ailments.
Tricky one!
Nobody would even take the offer serioud and after a while people would just think it’s some weird joke I do. So yes
EASY YES
>Only exception, you dont have to say it if the person is under 18, or if you can’t be sure of it.
I can never be sure of it. I’ve seen Benjamin Button, so I’ll never know for sure. thanks for the money!
I’d do it. As a seasoned gym bro I’ve spoken to people for literal years without introducing myself or asking what their name is.
I’m in. I would learn it in an obscure language- Scottish Galic or something.
I’m single and over 40. Not only I don’t meet people but at this point, if I asked a tree to marry me and it said yes, I’d just build a house around that tree so we can be together.
Of course I’d take the $5000
Well, it’d be fun to see how long it takes to get sacked asking every client and supplier to marry them. I’m definitely not going to conferences anymore.
It would make it easier to find a wife but at the risk of marrying a psychopath
Sure. I’ll take it. In last 5 years I met 2 new people. Both doctors from mental health department.
Start a business called “will you marry me.” Get that put on clothes and stuff like a logo. Always either wear those clothes or flash a business card.
Start a YouTube/TikTok channel and turn it into a bit. Then you’ll be known as the “Will you marry me?” guy/girl and gain notoriety. Then, people will know you and expect the question, but won’t be offended.
I barely meet new people and I’m already married so legally I can’t do it again.
Sure I’d do this.
I have to say the words “marry me”.
I live in a country where most people don’t speak English. Easy.
No.
Can i say it in a different, obscure language? Like hi, nice to meet you , (will you marry me in Ainu)
If so, easy moneyyyyy
And I can’t explain it away, but I can cover it up. Instead of just saying “Will you marry me?” I throw in some other random swear words and things that makes it seem like I have Tourette syndrome. I do not specifically say it, but just let people believe it.
Still, $5000 / month is not that much.
Doing some good networking is worth more and potential to make more than that, and can you imagine how effective you would be at a networking event where you meet 20 people and ask each one to marry you. It could be funny for the first two, but after that, you would just have the weirdo reputation and loose all effectiveness of even networking.
Also unless you work does not include meeting new clients, you will be fired or demoted or passed over for promotions because of this odd habit.
Of course, I could retire on just $5,000 month for the rest of life, and once retired I suppose I could make sure I rarely meet other people.
That will get you fired.
I mean I’m already married so it’s moot if they say yes, so why not 🤷♂️
Throw a silly compliment with each one, and make that your “thing”.
“Oh, you’re so fit, marry me! Haha!”
“Hey Bob, great shoes, wish I had fashion taste like that, marry me!!”
“You’re an accountant? Oh I’m so bad at money, marry me!”
I am a teacher, that will be odd.
Being the introvert that I am, and making double what I do now, this shouldn’t be a problem.
Yes, I make it a habit of not meeting new people
My religion doesn’t require paperwork to be considered married, just voiced intent and a declaration, and you can marry as many people as you’d like.
Imma just be getting married left and right, and everyone will think it’s a running joke with me. Easiest job ever.